Imagine feeling alone in a room full of people. Time and again, you’ve tried but your words have seemed to do more harm than good — or they are simply not heard at all. People you thought you were befriending misunderstand you, take a distance, or worse, they take offense and tell everyone about it. And because of this your have your guard up; you trust no one, and expect the worse from everyone.
I Was Keeping People At Arm’s Length
This is how I honestly felt about people. Even after spending countless hours in communication training, reading book after book about leadership, connection and influence. I felt awkward around people. And as the years passed this turned to distrust and a severely critical attitude about others. My business and relationships suffered so much.
My heart was suffering so much.
You see, I was aching to connect with people and have healthy stable lasting friendships. I just had no idea what that looked like anymore.
So, despite a deep desire to be for people, to help them and encourage them, I lived with my guard up constantly. Often not knowing what the right thing to say or do was and constantly feeling guilt, shame and regret.
How A Walk With God Changed It All
Then everything changed, because I changed. And that change came through a walk with God. Because of that change in me I have been able to walk away from all of that pain and;
- build trusting relationships with others
- help others in ways that really make them feel loved and cared for, even through social media
- have the confidence to start working on my dreams, and follow-through
- know in my heart people will want to listen
This increased confidence & trust in people, landed me my dream job, working on my dream project.
Leaving My Baggage Behind
Where before I was stuck in my work, resentful and fearful, God has molded a new person who is now finally growing every day, in every sense while working from home part-time — with the freedom to care for my four kids myself, oh yeah!!
I’m so happy to be set free from always having my guard up, waiting for the “other shoe to drop” right on my heart.
Finally I have the practical tools, and know what to say to help others. I no longer find myself rambling off into “bunny trails” trying to express empathy, but failing miserably. Bringing wounds to the foot of the cross has been the KEY, I now leave my baggage behind and truly, confidently and deeply can be there for people.
Just this last week alone I’ve had 7 people reach out to me after we met and tell me how blessed they felt by my support. I am blown away; in the 8 years I have been working online in a support function, people have rarely told me they felt personally cared for. My work was great, but I didn’t touch them personally.
Rekindle Your Love For People (This is YOUR Next Step!)
If you have been living a solitary “safe” life and avoiding the trouble that comes from dealing with people, and you are feeling it in every aspect of your work, life and spirituality. If ministry no longer feels joyful but is draining you, to the point you actively choose to do things that don’t involve a lot of in-person interactions you need to be part of this class, hands down.
Your next step may just be joining Dr. Mary in her Victory Battle group — it is not up yet, but you can pre-register here.