How Do You Have The Best Family Vacation Of Your Life?

FamilypicUtah

If we are friends on Facebook you will see from my personal profile Mary Starr Carter that my family and I have had an amazing summer. We traveled from Florida to Central NY this summer to stay on Oneida Lake in a little town called Constantia. Along this journey we have attended three conferences one we flew too in the state of Utah for. We even made a trek over to Canada to visit Niagara Falls with our Mississippi family.

NiagaraFalls

When we were planning this adventure we knew we wanted quality family time, a restful vacation, and exercise. For 41 years our summers have been filled with work, work, and more work. We realized our kids are growing fast and we want to make lasting quality memories with them.

It took us 41 years to have the best vacation of our lives. Here are some tips to help you have the best vacation of your life.

DECIDE

I am actually an indecisive person. It gets me in trouble and I will tend to put things off. But this year with the help of my decisive husband we DECIDED we were going to spend the SUMMER together.

You could also call this a GOAL. Do you have a goal of what you want to do this summer or next VACATION? Making the decision is the first step here is the next…

PRIORITIZE  

Work together with your family to decide what is most important to you. It may be relaxing on the beach reading books, it may be seeing as many sights as possible, it may be traveling to visit friends, it may be visiting historic places. You have to know what is important to those who are coming and of course with different personalities you might plan a combination of things so everyone gets to enjoy something they love.

For my husband and myself it was family time, exercise, and making memories with our kids.

Here is a picture of Jay on his bike. He biked 372 miles and ran almost 100 miles while we were gone. He loved it!

JayBike

PLAN & PROBLEM SOLVE

Once you decide and prioritize, you are ready to start planning. It’s important you prioritize first because you will need to make decisions based on those priorities. Here is an example:

We had to make a decision and plan when we attended our conferences if we would bring the kids with us or if they would stay home with a sitter… when we went back to our priorities we realized that making memories and being together was a priority even though it would be hard we would bring our kids with us to the conferences.

We made this decision knowing that the level that we could participate at our conferences would suffer but we decided to make that sacrifice because our priority was being with our kids this summer. Does that example help you see why priorities are important to set when planning a vacation?

Problems and challenges will also arise while you are planning, but keep in mind a problem is just a task to accomplish. I learned this from my mentor Dani Johnson and it has helped me a ton.

Here are 5 tips to help you with your vacation.

5Tipsbestvacationever

1. PROBLEM HOW DO I GET THE MONEY

Another problem that commonly comes up is how do we pay for our vacation? This actually stops most people before they even start… I CAN’T AFFORD IT… I DON’T HAVE THE MONEY…

Or others use credit cards to splurge and suffer the consequences later. When I was 22 my girlfriends and I decided we were going on a cruise. I didn’t set up a plan or problem solve how I would get the money. The result was the beginning of credit card use that I would rely on until I got control and learned how to manage and plan for expenses and get out of credit card debt.

So to solve the money problem and to avoid getting into credit card debt here are some ideas for you:

– Get a part time job, lawn or cleaning service, bake goods or make crafts and sell them at shows.

– Re-allocate your monies… instead of doing $600 worth of landscaping this summer use that money towards your vacation and plant a pretty weed garden. Stop buying things that aren’t a necessity.

– Read my friend Claudia Looi’s eBook:

save over $2000 to travel or buy anything you want

1 Simple Way to Save Over $2,000 to Travel or Buy Anything YOU Want

–  Start a Home Business and use the money for your travel. And once you are in a home business you can plan a meeting or two in the locations you travel too and now your mileage and travel can be a tax deduction.

This is a picture of my sister in law and niece visiting Niagara Falls for the first time ever. They used family members’ airline miles, saved and had several garage sales to afford their vacation.

NiagaraFallsWaterfalls

Here are 2 more tips that can help you have the best summer vacation ever!

2. SAY NO

Last summer when we spent 2 and a half weeks in Central NY, we had so much planned including multiple meetings, visits with friends and associates, after we had just spent 3 weeks on the road for work. It was really really really intense. To the point that my husband suffered serious adrenal fatigue that took him months to recover from. It was too much.

So this summer when the invitations to come and speak or even visit friends started coming at me I said NO.  I simply said this summer is about spending as much time with my family as possible… AND THAT IS WHAT WE DID.

This is a picture of my kids having an awesome time with their cousins. They loved spending time with them.

Cousinspic

3. WE SAID YES TO HEALTH

Learning from last year’s mistakes we knew there were some important things we needed for everyone to stay healthy and happy. Good sleep, decent food, and exercise. My husband is training for a triathlon. He gets out almost everyday on vacation to exercise. He bikes 20 – 60 plus miles 3 times or runs 4-13 miles.

I made it a priority to walk or jog 3-4 times a week, in hotels I go to the gym, and I even made it to my favorite Central NY gym Metro Fitness East for some group classes. We did our best to plan out our meals. Shakes have been a staple to help keep us getting all the good nutrition we need especially when your Italian family invites you over for dinner, it’s a picnic food day or you know you will be eating bonfire smores that night.

There were a few nights that we or the kids were still wound up from the day so we would take my favorite sleepy time immune building supplement Immupro. We are also taking our supplement routines daily including Ningxia Red, Mineral Essence, Multigreens, NingXia Nitro and Mindwise plus essential oils and our new pain cream for sore muscles. In 60 days we were away from home and our routines and no one has gotten sick, thrown up, or suffered any terrible hurts that have stopped them from being active. God’s grace on us, combined with our efforts, have kept us healthy so far.

4. LESS IS MORE

This is a picture of the camp we stayed in most of the vacation. It was small, filled with spiders, a dead mouse, and the toilet worked some of the time. But it was also filled with so much love, fun and peace.

Camp

I know everyone is different and some individuals love to pack as many adventures as possible in their vacations and others just want to CHILL. But when I say less is more I mean the following.

Spending more money doesn’t mean more fun. For my kids, I initially wanted to take them to the parks, zoo, etc. but they actually had a ball just staying at our camp. They would roll down the hill, run around barefoot in the grass, and watch the wildlife for their entertainment.

Sarahrollingdownhill

Get the most out of your adventures as a family or couple or single but really taking advantage of all the FREE things there are to do first. What amenities does the hotel or camp place have? Would your family be happy swimming everyday?

And I have to admit even bringing some of our DVDs and watching a kid’s movie some nights or PBS in the mornings helped us stay sane.

Carfullofstuff

5. IT’S NOT EASY BUT IT’S WORTH IT

A family vacation isn’t always easy. Airports, driving thousands of miles, bathroom stops in the middle of nowhere, and feeding your crew are some of the stressors of travel.   There will be days you just want to cry, where you just want to sleep in your own bed, shower in your own shower, and cook on your own stove. But in the end you will create memories that will last a lifetime.

My kids won’t forget their time at Grandpa’s this year. All the work, planning, and problem solving are so worth it when you see those amazing memories on your Facebook feed. LOL!

Here is a picture of Sarah Grace and Grandpa.

GrandpaSarahWalking

So what are you waiting for? It’s time for you and your family to enjoy life more. Make the decision today about your next VACATION… you need one!

The Spirit of Offense

David and caleah

I cried when I saw this picture of my new niece and her daddy. A new life in the world is so beautiful but God revealed something more to me when I looked at this picture that broke me.

See recently I have been slightly persecuted by friends, colleagues and even family for my over zealous “selling” of a program that changed my life. “Shut up already”,  “I don’t want to hear about it”,  “it’s not for me”,  “it’s not the only good program out there”. Have you ever been rejected, called names, or even lost friendships over something you believed in strongly? It can hurt and it can shut you down.

Several years ago we had one interaction with a colleague that hurt my husband so badly that he literally quit that “selling” part of his job for many, many years. This person was irritated by what we were “selling” and verbally made it known. My husband was wounded and he allowed pride to take on a SPIRIT OF OFFENSE.

The Spirit of Offense is a tool by Satan to trap and hold you from all that God wants you to do and to be. It stops you from serving others, helping, or selling something you know is proven to change people’s lives.  The words of one person shut him down from helping hundreds and probably thousands of people.

The Definition of Offenses: From the Greek “to put a stumbling block in the way, cause to be caught (or) fall away, be led into sin, offend, anger, shock”.

Offense is like an automatic weapon. Once you pull the trigger, it keeps firing. – Kathy DeGraw

Offense are seeds that once planted are fertilized by ego and pride and grow into some horrific weeds in our lives including fear, doubt, anger, resentment, distrust, and blanket opinions.

The reality is we are not going to stop offenses coming our way but we must know what to do when they do happen:

1. Recognize the seeds that was planted

2. Forgive right away: The harboring of unforgiveness in our lives can cut off our connections to the Holy Spirit and can delay God’s perfect plan for our lives.

3. Search your heart: Seeds of Offense can turn into deep roots that we may not even be conscious of.  Searching your heart for areas of offense, unforgiveness, ego and pride can turn up these deep roots.

4. Turn to God’s Word: Ask God to reveal scripture, verses, or prayers to pray over these hidden GIANTS in your life. Ask Him to uproot these monsters with the Spirit of FORGIVENESS that He gave us and you freely give to others. “Forgive us our debts as we forgive others.”

5. Heal: In some cases you may find complete deliverance and freedom after an act of true forgiveness and other times healing will be a process.

After attending one of those programs I like to sell I found out I had been harboring some deep seeded anger and resentment against some leaders who crookedly embezzled a company I love.  It had been 9 years and I thought I had forgiven them and moved on.  But apparently I hadn’t and during this seminar God ordained an awakening to the fact that I hadn’t forgiven them.

When I truly forgave them this newfound freedom and lightness came over me and I still have it weeks later. Oddly I became more comfortable, outgoing, and self-assured in group settings too. It was really weird and showed me how unforgiveness and the Spirit of Offense can affect so many areas of our life.

Caleah

So back to my original story. See this picture of my brother in law and his beautiful family.  When you watch the video below you will hear all the changes that happened for David after attending that program I “sell” too much. One of which was how God moved his heart from never wanting any more children to seeking God’s plan for his family. When this video was taken, little did we know that his beautiful wife Samantha was already pregnant.

The program is called First Steps to Success and recently my “selling” has caused some backlash to point where I considered backing down and not sharing so much.  I have had a lot of opportunity for the Spirit of Offense to take hold of me…  but I won’t let it.  Because it’s not about me… it’s about the peoples’ lives that will be changed because I share.

No one leaves a First Steps to Success without being changed. They offer a full money back guarantee if you aren’t satisfied. So how about you? Are you ready to experience a change? Are you ready to learn more about things that are holding you back? I feel blessed if you made it to the end of the article and didn’t shut down or walk away from something that could literally transform your life like it did for David. Please consider it. I have 1 ticket left to the next First Steps to success training, and possibly the only ticket if it’s sold out by the time you read this. Give me a call 315-836-2014 ext. 1. Let’s learn and grow together.

God Bless you my friend,
Mary Starr Carter

A message from David

Skin time caleah and david

Caleah is such a blessing to us and we’re doing great (I guess after 4 babies you start to know what to do!).  I attached a picture of her and I have our first skin on skin time last night 🙂 As I had everyone gathered around last night at the house for dinner I was recounting the story of how I was so against another child and Samantha’s longing for one.

Whenever people used to ask me about more children I was adamant that the only way we were having another child is if God himself changed my mind…. funny how God works isn’t it?  So for the past 9 months I have been faithful to give God the glory and now I have an opportunity to explain how much God has done in my life and how he has changed me from the inside out to give me a heart for another little blessing.

Actionable Faith: Do You Have It?

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Have you ever had God bring a new friendship into your life right when you needed it?

Have you ever followed God’s intuitive nudge to go do something or go somewhere and it ended up being the perfect thing you needed to experience, see or hear?

Or have you ever gotten those perfect words of encouragement just when you needed them?

Here are 3 stories of 3 experiences that have really impacted me and given me direction and tools for my future parenting. I hope they bless you too.

My dear friend and I hadn’t chatted in months but one night out of blue she texted, “Hope you are doing well and God is doing amazing things for you and your family? You are always on my heart and in my prayers.” The next 20 minutes of texting would encourage my soul and remind me of the tools I have as a mom in Christ.

Rebekah is one of the most positive and encouraging people you could meet. She is beautiful on the inside and out. On top of her many responsibilities, a newborn, a 3 year old, a 6 year old, a husband who works long hours and goes to school, she struggles with some painful health challenges. Although she has all that going on, she stays positive. I often think how does she do it? But I am reminded in our text chat how she does it… It is her ACTIONABLE FAITH.

What is Actionable Faith? I don’t know the official definition but here is what I believe it is; Putting your Faith into Action. An example would be when a difficulty comes up you go to the Word and remember who you are in Christ and you ACT and LIVE like that.

I wrote Rebekah how I was struggling with homeschooling she is a year or so ahead of me in the journey and she writes back, “Ahh yes school! It sure is challenging but nothing you can’t handle!

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Her simple reminder helped me realize the POWER I have because Christ is in me. When I try to understand how Rebekah with all these great stressors in her life does it… quite simply she doesn’t but Christ that lives in her DOES. When you take the stress and striving off of your shoulders and trust in the One who made you and is in you and then ACT on that, your life just gets a whole lot easier. And that is how Rebekah can be so positive even on her worst days. ACTIONABLE FAITH.

My next story I hope encourages all you moms who are pouring into your children, Grooming the Next Generation. I got up early one morning to have quiet time before the big First Steps to Success seminar. When I was done it was still the very early hours of morning so I thought I’d catch a few more winks before I got ready for my day. But God gently nudged me saying go downstairs and get in line there is something waiting for you there.

So I trudged off pouting a little bit but went and got my place in line. I sat down next to this pretty younger woman and after a few minutes started a conversation. In the following 30 minutes I would be in tears when I realized what God was showing me.

See those weeks prior to that event my biggest worry was about my children and my adequacy of homeschooling them. This beautiful young woman was 17 years old and for the past 8 years her parents had been Grooming and homeschooling her and her 2 sisters for success in life. See her parents had gotten plugged into First Steps to Success 8 years prior and started studying Grooming the Next Generation for Success. Grooming the Next Generation for Success is based on Biblical Principals and is techniques and tools for raising successful children who mature into successful adults. Again ACTIONABLE FAITH this young woman’s parents took their faith based training and put it into their lives.

As I listened to this mature 17 year old woman share all her wonderful experiences over the past 8 years, her kind nature, her giving spirit, and purity shined through. Her homeschooling was just a piece of her Grooming. Her parents gave their children real life experiences even living and working in a foreign country for a year and taking care of orphans. They got to explore their hobbies and even apprentice with local artisans. I was brought to tears because in those minutes with this young woman God was reassuring me that I was on the right track and had the tools to Groom my children for success too in life.

Here is a link to one of those tools, Grooming the Next Generation for Success. They are a series of trainings that shares grooming techniques to raise up successful kids that mature into successful adults.

grooming the next generation
My last story also comes from one of those God nudges. To make a long story short I wanted to do one thing but God nudged me again to do another… so I did it but with a bad attitude until I realized that my obedience to obey Divinely ordained an amazing new friendship and people into our lives.

Recently I spent the afternoon with my new friend Amanda and her two teenage girls. Right away we were impressed with the two girls. They were polite, respectful, well spoken and loved kids. They engaged in conversations and were the exact opposite of most teenagers I knew. They never even looked at a cell phone, they knew how to have conversations, and their hobbies weren’t video games. And did I mention these girls loved God and weren’t embarrassed to tell you. Wow how can I raise my kids up to be this pleasant? So later that day I asked Amanda and this is what she said.

“I wasn’t raised with these principals of success.” So the first thing Amanda did was work on her. 10 years ago she got her life right with God. She was introduced to Dani Johnson’s Spiritual Equipping Trainings and just started to plug into them day and night. She changed her life and her marriage. Then she got exposed to those same Grooming the Next Generation for success trainings.

She would have the audios playing in the background every day for 1-2 hours. Every week she, her husband, and her 2 girls would sit and watch 15-20 minutes of the training together and talk about it. They literally would have an appointment in their calendar to do this. And then they would practice what they learned. 10 years of practicing and grooming in all the different seasons of their family’s growth and struggles. It wasn’t easy. For the past 10 years she has worked nights as a nurse and would many times have to make sacrifices of sleep and more to invest in her children and marriage, but her sacrifices have paid off and her children are incredible. ACTIONABLE FAITH.

What about you? Are you ready to take your Faith and putting it into the Actions of your life? Maybe this is your nudge to invest into your personal development by getting some Spiritual Equipping training or your Parenting Training with Grooming the Next Generation for Success?

I know I will be following this direction. We only get a short period of time with our kids. Why not get the training to groom them for success? Why not start with changing our lives and taking ACTIONABLE FAITH? I know you can make a change no matter where you are in life or what season you are in. I believe in you. YOU CAN DO THIS.  Remember Romans 8:11.

Truth and Lies About Money

debt

Last night I interviewed a couple who would like to partner with us in business. This couple reminded me of where Jay and I were just 7 years ago. A few minutes into the conversation we realized they were DESPERATE to make their home business work just like we were years ago. Why? Because they were literally drowning in debt and were robbed of quality time and freedom in their lives. They were slaves to a JOB and working. Like us they felt they had no choice but to do what they were doing all along just becoming more and more DESPERATE to find a way out of the pit of poverty.

On the outside Desperate Diane and David (we will call them) are living the American Dream. Living in a great neighborhood, in a beautiful $200,000 home, their kids are going to the best schools, and David the main earner in the family has a DREAM JOB earning over 6 figures a year. But look a little closer and you will find so much stress, tension and despair. David commutes 2 hours a day and most nights doesn’t get home until after 8 pm. His health has suffered and recently he had a minor car accident because he fell asleep at the wheel coming home from work.

Diane is an amazing wife and mother who cares for their home and family mostly by herself. She works a seasonal job earning an extra $2000 a month. She will work 30 hours a week during the kids’ school time and sleep time. She loves the work but it’s grueling as she sacrifices her sleep and sanity. This is what she said about the extra weekly paycheck she gets during her seasonal job. “Its like a million dollars to us. It gives us room to breathe a little and takes the stress off of our finances and keeps us from using our credit cards for groceries and day to day expenses.” Do you know that feeling?  Do you know what it’s like to have to use your credit card to pay for day to day expenses?

They have $25,000 dollars in credit card debt, plus they have Student Loans, Car Loans, Medical Debt, and a Mortgage. Even though they earn great money they spend everything and then some every month. WHY? Because they are in POVERTY. See Poverty isn’t just for those earning under the Poverty Line. It’s a label for anyone who uses all the money they earn every month.

Is that blowing your brain? Maybe you are thinking how can you call me poor, I earn more than $60,000 a year. I can call you poor if you are spending all the money you earn in a year and then some.

Let me share our story of poverty with you.

This past year our home business parent company gave my husband and I a surprise letter at our company convention to be backstage at a certain time for a HISTORICAL AWARD. We thought simply it was because we had been in the company for 15 plus years and they were awarding us a longevity award. As we took the stage with more than 25 other leaders from our company the MC explained that every member who was on stage was part of an elite group who have earned 1 MILLION DOLLARS or more in the company. My husband and I looked at each other and our hearts sank, we turned a few shades of pale and immediately got sick to our stomachs… WHY???? Because simply we had earned over 1 million dollars and SPENT over 1 million dollars… AGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH! We had no significant savings, do not own a home, don’t own our vehicles yet, and still have over $100,000 in Student Loan Debt.

So what is the difference between Desperate Diane and David and my husband and I… ONE THING. See in 2008 Jay and I became serious about digging out of the Pit of Despair. We got a hold of a Training Program that gave us a plan to get back on track.  We worked that plan really well for 3 years and paid off more than $150,000 in debt before we started to slack again. I can give you a list of excuses why we became lazy again but that is all they are… EXCUSES.

Our household income went significantly up so there seemed to be less stress and our lives got busier when my husband started a new job and we started a family. So again we would spend all we made. We also started investing in some things without wise counsel, which took more than $100,000.

Although it set us back some we still have been able to pay off $280,000 in 6 years and 8 months. WOW, right? Some people would be totally out of debt if they had just stuck to the plan, but sadly we made more debt because we made more money. It’s such a slippery slope you can fall down when you have the paycheck or in our case a commission check that comes every month. It’s dangerous unless you have the skills to handle money correctly.

So during our interview with Desperate Diane and David we told them that most people with that much financial stress in their lives don’t usually find significant success in their own home business right away unless they get their money management and debt under control first. We also have made it a requirement for our new team members and staff to take this Financial Program.

The Programs are:

WAR ON DEBT

War on Debt

DEBT ELIMINATION AND FINANCIAL INDEPENDENCE

Debt Elimination & Financial Independence

The greatest feeling in the world is paying off your debt and getting out of bondage. It’s amazing to watch our team members and staff create a new happiness and lightness to their lives. They are happier, healthier, and are way less stressed. THEY ARE BETTER Employees, Business Developers, Parents, Spouses, Friends and People.

When you break free from POVERTY it is a freedom like you and I can’t even imagine.  I have had a little taste of it and I look forward to the day that we are completely free.  My husband and I also look forward to the day that YOU are FREE. I hope you will make the investment in your future happiness by getting

WAR ON DEBT and DEBT ELIMINATION AND FINANCIAL INDEPENDENCE

 

God Bless your Success,

Mary Starr Carter
The Total Wellness Doc and Mom

This is Your Year and Mine

new year

Have you thought about what 2016 will be like?

It’s hours away and a WHOLE NEW YEAR will be HERE. It’s exciting, overwhelming, and sad all at the same time. Exciting to see what the New Year will bring for you and me, overwhelming with all the things that we think we would like to accomplish, and sad that another wonderful Christmas season has gone by.

But this year I think things are going to be really different for you and me because this year we are going to LIVE our LIVES INTENTIONALLY. What do I mean by INTENTIONALLY?

You know how a whole year can go by and you didn’t get the things done that you wanted to. You know this time last year you made a commitment to take 1 day off of work a week but that didn’t really happen. Or you had planned to take your eldest daughter on a mother daughter retreat but that didn’t happen. Or maybe you said this is the year you and your family are going to start doing local missions or community service together but that didn’t happen either. What are the things you wanted to accomplish but didn’t last year?

For me I actually accomplished a few things I wanted to because I started living my life intentionally at about the end of May last year. At the end of May I started to implement something called TIME SECRETS. It’s not really a secret but it is a strategy to really live your LIFE by DESIGN. Its been exciting to see things accomplished or at least progress made on some of my goals and desires.

Many of you who read my newsletters and blogs are in a business of some sort. You, like me, have goals for your 2016 year. Now look back at last year and the time you spent in your business. Were there projects, events, tasks, or people that you spent time with that were not a good investment of your resources? Only you can answer that. Look at the time you spent with a fine tooth comb and see if you see what I saw? See, after 16 years I am finally having a HUGE AHA moment and realizing that I have not been a good steward of my time and resources.

One of the areas I need to change is in some of the projects or people I serve. I like FIXING PEOPLE. I have a gift of seeing people’s potential and developing and giving them a whole system of success. That’s not a problem. It is when I go overboard and OVERPROMISE and OVERDO my giving or simply DO THE WORK FOR THEM….  AGGGHHHH. Do you have this problem too?

For 16 years I have given, fixed, corrected, overdone, and exhausted myself in OVER HELPING. See, God tells us to SERVE others but He doesn’t tell us to ENABLE OTHERS. God also tells us to Prioritize Him, our Marriage, our Children above other things. When we OVERDO for others because it makes us FEEL good we neglect some area of our life. It could be in our marriage, children or our own health.
This year one of my employees, attending www.firststepstosuccess.com, and the program Time Secrets helped me to wake up to my OVERDOING behaviors.

But the best gift of knowledge I got this year in helping my 2016 year be AMAZING came this past week and I want to share it with you. It is from the www.ibloom.co the Life and Business Planner 2016 Virtual Retreat. When you purchase this Planner at http://ibloom.co/planner/ you get this very, very valuable 2 day Virtual Retreat PowerPoints and accompanying audios. There are over 6 hours of content to help you prepare for 2016. I have been listening and re-listening to it for over a week and every time I get another nugget and some AHA’s for my year. It’s an excellent investment. I really hope you will get it and go through the training and prepare your year.

So for me my theme for 2016 is ME… What about you? What will your THEME for 2016 be? Don’t know what that means? Get the Planner and they explain it. For me this is the year of making WISER decisions about where I spend my time, what I do, who I help, how I serve others. I want to make myself a priority so I can be the best in my marriage and with my children. A happy you, a happy life, makes you much better in business.  I hope you will consider doing the same and making YOU a priority in 2016.

We have to remember we are not selfish when we care for OURSELVES and do things for OURSELVES because when you don’t CARE for yourself you end up EMPTY and eventually BROKEN… Make this year will be the YEAR OF YOU… HEALTHY and WHOLE.

I promise to walk you through my journey and I hope you will share with me your stories of caring for yourself too.  LOVE YOU. Make you a priority. God Bless your 2016. I will be praying for your success.

 

Mary Starr Carter
the Total Wellness Doc and Mom

Gabe Memorial

Gabe pic

Last night I realized it was the year anniversary of the birth of my baby Gabe. Gabe was technically labeled a miscarriage instead of stillborn since I was just shy of the 20 weeks when a baby is labeled a stillborn. I know it’s not comfortable to read about nor is it super comfortable to write about, but I felt like I needed to acknowledge his birth day. Because for me each of my 4 babies who are in heaven have a birthday. Gabe I carried the longest of my miscarriages and it was emotionally and physically the roughest for both myself and my husband.

But the night he was born was really beautiful filled with the PEACE that passes all understanding. I had amazing hospital staff at Sacred Heart Emerald Coast, my Midwife from Gentle Birth Options in Niceville, Florida came to the hospital to be with me and Dr. Jennifer Esses the OBGYN really honored my wishes with the delivery. I also had the support of my husband and the relaxing comfort of my beautiful Young Living essential oils. But as amazing as they all were it was the Peace that Passes all understanding that got me through that night. It was Jesus Christ’s love and compassion for me that surrounded me with His Holy Spirit comforting me beyond explanation. I was blessed that night and even through the grief and pain and sickness, later on I was blessed by hundreds of prayers and Facebook notes.

So last night when I put up that memorial post for my son Gabe I was once again overwhelmed with virtual hugs, prayers, and blessings and reminded that even in our worse days God can cover us and heal our hearts.

If you are hurting, feeling lost, feeling hopeless, I hope you will call Jesus into your heart and ask for the Peace that Passes all understanding.  I promise you that when you take the heart of Christ into your own and Renew your mind with His word your life and life circumstances will never be hopeless again.

God Bless you and thank you for caring about our family.

Mary Starr Carter
The Total Wellness Doc and Mom

Tips for your Stressful Weeks

tips to better sleep
It’s 4 am and I can’t sleep. It’s been a full couple of days and I have a lot on my mind. My husband and I have worked as a powerhouse team in life and business these last 4 days. It is amazing what we can do and handle when we have too.

In the last 4 days we spent hours doing client care and leadership development, made it to the last stages of hiring a new staff member, prepped and launched a class, recorded a business training review, which resulted in our home business growing by 15% ending October with a new record month in sales.

In our full time job at home where we are grooming, schooling and raising kids. We also enjoyed going to the pumpkin corn maize farm, hair cuts, cooking, cleaning and grocery shopping, volunteering, setting our monthly budget, paying the bills which resulted in another personal debt demolished.

Having a full and busy life might be your normal routine but add in 2 kids who also came down with an intense stomach bug and the last 4 days were also spent taking turns cleaning up poopy messes and monitoring temperatures every other hour. We are on the tail end of it and although it was a tough 4 days, we made it through.

How do you get through Tough Times? Here are of my helpful hints:

Tips for your Stressful Weeks
1. Team Work
This is our number ONE strategy in getting through stressful times. Together you make a list and prioritize what needs to get done and who will do it. Make sure one partner is not getting stuck all day with no sleep and cleaning up messes.  This may require a spouse to take a day off, cancel an appointment or activities, and most likely sacrifice regular routines.

2. Use your Essential Oils
When you are stressed it is so important to use your essential oils day in and day out. My favorites through tough times are Stress Away, Idaho Black Spruce or Idaho Balsam Fir, Joy and Peace and Calming all by Young Living Essential Oils.

I try to wear them as perfume during the day, at night for bed, and even put them on sore muscles. I recommend applying them at least 2-3 times a day topically and inhaling them from the bottle or tissue 10 times a day. Long deep breaths for 30 seconds to a minute really help lower your stress.

3. Pray
STRESS and WORRY can be hard to avoid when you go through a tough time. Whether it is days or weeks. I recently watched some family members totally rely on Christ when they were given some difficult news about their health. In the end it was God who pulled through with a positive outcome. Worry robs your own health. Relying on Christ doesn’t mean you don’t monitor things or use medical intervention when needed it just means you know where your source and strength comes from.

4. Energy Support
During challenging times it’s easy to go for the carbs, cookies, and coffee. NingXia Red, NingXia Zyng, and NingXia Nitro are 3 products can help your body during stressful times. NingXia Red is our overall nutritional supplement juice it’s delicious and nutritious for all ages. NingXia Zyng is my go to drink when I need a little kick. I love the refreshing taste and I instantly feel more alert and focused.

But on my longest days with little sleep I add NingXia Nitro to my routine. It’s a much safer energy shot with lots of vitamins and nutrition and very little caffeine. None of these NingXia products give you a crash and burn like those other energy products and during my hardest days NingXia Red helps me keep my energy up, stay positive, and have more patience.

Tips for your Stressful Weeks Image Credit: Young Living

5. Diffusing
When you have stress, diffusing essential oils is important. When you have sick smell throughout your house from diarrhea, diffusing essential oils is a necessity. Diffusing Young Living essential oils are a much safer solution to freshen the air than chemical sprays, plug ins and even candles. Toxin free blends like Purification or RC essential oils are some of my favorite ways to freshen the air. You can get a set of 10 different essential oils and a diffuser in our Premium Start Living kit.

6. REST
Lack of sleep is the one thing that can destroy your patience, health, and happiness during tough times. When we get very little sleep because of a little one being sick or our work schedule we will take turns giving each other some rest time. This means that one spouse might take care of the kids when they come home from work so the other can take a nap.  It may mean instead of working during the kids naptime we sleep too. Or in the worse times it means we take turns, one spouse will take care of the kids while the other sleeps.  You must find strategies for getting rest.

7. Hire Help
You may think you can’t afford it but you can’t afford not too. Getting a helper for a few hours a week so you can take a nap, go to an exercise class, get the grocery shopping done quickly, or simply have them help with preparing meals, do dishes or laundry can mean the difference between your health and happiness.

I started with hiring some responsible high school students for a couple hours a week and eventually moved to get help daily with childcare and home responsibilities. Even trading with another mom, getting a grandparent to help, and simply asking for help will help your situation. You are not less of a mom or parent just because you can’t do it all, and sometimes you actually may be able to do it better than anyone you hire, but just because you can doesn’t mean you should. Letting go is one of the hardest thing you can do, but it also allows you to become your best.

So I hope you will make your health a priority especially during difficult times.  Use some of these simple tips and techniques to take some of the stress off.  Let me know how it goes.

Take the Risk

take the risk

Have you ever taken a big risk in your life? How did it turn out? Did you go back to school or change your career later in life? Did you spend a year abroad with your family learning about different cultures? Did you start a new business investing a lot of money? Did you leave your job to homeschool your child who was struggling?

I would love to know what risks you took and how it turned out. See, exactly 2 years ago I took a risk and got on a plane with my 6 month old baby to explore a place that would end up being our new home. It was all quite scary. A different climate, no friends, no established networks, and a very different way of life.

We took the risk and it was full of struggles in the beginning. I literally was petrified to go outside for weeks because of creepy crawly things. Our marriage was quite strained those first months, we suffered loss, we were still digging out of debt, and we were struggling to find work life family balance.

But the struggle was worth it in the end. We would find a place of healing, growth, overcoming, and strengthening as individuals and a family. We would find simplicity, true abundance, awakenings, and God’s revelations. We would be blessed with incredible friendships and family.

What if we hadn’t taken the risk? Where would we be? The only word I can think of is LESS.

If we hadn’t taken the risk and walked in faith then we never could have received the blessings he gave us here. Specifically a stronger relationship with God, a better marriage, a deeper connection with my children, new friendships, new clients to serve and people to bless, and a business that doubled in size in the 2 years we have lived here. WOW.

FAILURES

But with that said there are risks that can lead to failures or even worse. You know what I mean. Marriages that end in divorce, businesses that go bankrupt, the house you were going to fix up and flip becomes a money pit with little return, the friendship ends up being one sided, the person you brought into your circle of influence ends up stealing from you or others, and the list goes on. My husband and I have experienced many of these. When so many people have a failure or deep hurt, they stop trying, give up, or become jaded with their opinions and stop taking risks.  I think that is sad and much of it stems from unforgiveness. It is pretty freeing to really forgive and move on.

And lastly sometimes we take risks we really should not have taken. We get an idea, think it’s the best idea ever, and without any wise counsel we JUMP RIGHT IN. Are you like me? I have an idea, think it’s the best and then just GO GO GO… Aggghhhh that has cost me a lot financially and led to poor health.

So what is WISE COUNSEL? Wise counsel includes someone with experience in what you are setting out to do. Maybe you want to start a home business so you talk to your aunt who “tried” it for a couple of months. Your aunt failed at it and now thinks all home businesses are scams. She is not WISE COUNSEL because she has little experience and never got professional training to develop the skills of success. If you want to do something like become a realtor, then interview successful realtors and learn what it takes to be the best. Learn from several people who have had success but make sure you also investigate their family life, personal relationships, health, etc.

See, being the top dog earning multiple 6 figures a year may not be what you want if it means working 60 plus hours a week with no time for self care or family. You may have a goal to start a home business so you can have more quality time with your family. In your interviews you find a wonderful family who has the freedom and happiness you desire. It took them 4-6 years working 10 hours a week to earn  $30,000 residually a year. If they have the results you want then they would be some great WISE COUNSEL.

Here are a few scriptures about wise counsel:

Proverbs 12:15
The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice.

Proverbs 11:14
Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety.

Proverbs 19:20-21
Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future. Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.

Proverbs 15:22
Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.

So I encourage you to take risks, forgive your failures and hurts, seek wise counsel and then GO FOR IT! You will always miss 100% of the opportunities  you didn’t take.

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

5 Benefits Of Juicing For Your Family

benefits of juicing

This past weekend I watched a powerful documentary on the Gerson Therapy called Dying to have Known. A big part of this Gerson Therapy, which helps restore even the most diseased body to health is JUICING. It reinvigorated me to start juicing again.  Ironically two days after watching the movie, I walked into the room where my toddler was watching Curious George on PBS. Guess what? Curious George the monkey was juicing with The Man with the Yellow Hat. Even monkeys think juicing is important. Too funny I think it was a sign.

The episode showed how George and The Man with the Yellow Hat were hooked on Juicy Jay’s special blended juice and bought the juicer to create their own drink at home. As with all Curious George stories, he always ends up learning something new and benefits from the lesson. George recreated, experimented and messed up but ultimately learned to create a juice that impresses Juicy Jay. Here is the link for parents or grandparents with kids who like Curious George.

Are you a juicer? Before I continue on with the benefits of juicing, here are two articles that I’ve written about juicing:

Juice Detox Fast
7 Days of Juice Fasting – Almost

Juicing is not easy. I’ve experienced so many benefits of juicing and here are five benefits:

One: Fortifying and healing the body
Interestingly my last two pregnancies happened (I conceived) while I was juicing daily. It was important to re-fortify and heal my body especially after a miscarriage.

Two: Help ward off dis-ease
In reality, fast and processed foods are the foods that most Americans are consuming each day. Healthy eating takes effort and planning. Most of us grew up eating less than the recommended amount of vegetables and fruits per day. Juicing will allow us to consume a huge selection of fruits and vegetables per day.

Imagine if we did just a juice a day with raw, unprocessed fruits and vegetables! Our body will absorb all the nutrients and gain health benefits from the fruits and vegetables. What an incredible way to ward off dis-ease with natural wholesome foods.

Three: Provide high quality nutrition
Raw fruits and vegetables provide minerals, vitamins, phytonutrients, antioxidants and other high quality nutrition for our body. Some nutrients and important enzymes found in vegetables may be destroyed when cooked.

Freshly pressed juice from raw vegetables and fruits provide the most high quality nutrition according to Gerson.org. According to Gerson.org:

By juicing, patients can take in the nutrients and enzymes from nearly 15 pounds of produce every day, in a manner that is easy to digest and absorb.

The Gerson Therapy uses organic, vegetarian diet, raw juices, coffee enemas and natural supplements to help the body heal itself. This therapy was started by Dr. Max Gerson in the 1930s initially to help with his migraines. He eventually developed it into treating degenerative diseases such as skin tuberculosis, diabetes and cancer.

You can read more by visiting Gerson.org.

Four: Lose some weight
Fruits and vegetables contain low calories and fats and have a good source of dietary fiber. Losing weight takes more than consuming a certain type of food or exercise. It involves your total being- your body, mind and soul.

Juicing may help with weight loss because you will be consuming fewer calories and vegetables can help balance our body’s pH. Alkaline foods will help release acidity and fat cells in our body.

Five: Gain more energy and look younger
My accountant, Joanne Del Bolso is living proof of a person who benefited from juicing. She looked radiant and younger when I saw her after tax season when most accountants were either drained or burned out.

Juicing helps to flush out toxins. This will lead to an increase of energy, clearer mind and more radiant skin.

About fruits and vegetables:
Before you start using, you need to have a plan of action, the right equipment and a shopping list. Remember not all fruits and vegetables are created equal.

The Environmental Working Group (EWG) organization releases a yearly list called the Dirty Dozen. The Shopper’s Guide to Pesticides in Produce will help you determine which fruits and vegetables to avoid or buy organic.

There is no denying that a diet rich in fruits and vegetables brings benefits to our health but we need to be informed about pesticide exposure as well. Here is a link to the EWG website and list of Dirty Dozen Plus and Clean Fifteen.

About cleaning the juicer:
Some of us may hate the cleaning up processes after drinking the juice. Whatever type of juicer you use, it is important to note that proper cleaning is essential to good health. Clean your juicer immediately after use to prevent contamination or bacteria build up.

What is your plan of action?
There are many ways to juicing. Consult with your health care professional (a professional knowledgeable about nutrition and juicing) and decide on what type of juicing is beneficial to your health.

We would like to know what you did and the results you get. Please leave us a comment below.

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Problems with Gluten Intolerance

Problems with Gluten Intolerance

What is gluten? The same question was asked at a recent Jimmy Kimmel Live Show and none of the interviewees who embrace the gluten-free diet knew exactly what gluten is.

Gluten is a protein naturally found in certain grains such as wheat, barley, rye and crossbreeds of these grains. Wheat flour in supermarket shelves may be sold as bromated, enriched, phosphate, plain and self-rising. They may also come with names like spelt, semolina, kamut, graham flour, farina, durum flour and bulgur. (Source: Mayo Clinic and LivingBetterAmerica)

Foods like bagels, breads, cakes, croutons, cereals, cookies, crackers, pasta and pizza are made with these grains. Gluten is also found as a food filler in imitation meat, veggie burgers, candy, seasoned rice mixes, sauces, snacks, processed meats, gravies, beer, soups and packaged ready-made food. You may even find it in prescription drugs and over the counter medications.

How is gluten free defined?

FDA defines gluten free as foods that do not contain the following ingredients-
● Gluten-containing grain (including spelt, wheat)
● Gluten-containing grain that has not been processed to remove gluten (e.g. wheat flour)
● Gluten-containing grain that has been processed to remove gluten (e.g. wheat starch) if the use of that ingredient results in the presence of 20 parts per million (ppm) or more gluten in the food

How do you know if you have gluten intolerance or gluten sensitivities?

1. Skin rashes – there are many factors that may cause skin rashes. It may look like you have eczema but keratosis pilaris and dermatitis herpetiformis are two skin problems due to gluten intolerance. Keratosis pilaris is usually white, sometimes red and usually doesn’t hurt or itch. Dermatitis herpetiformis is extremely itchy rash and consists of bumps and blisters. The rash is chronic. These rashes appear on arms, torso, face, buttocks, elbows, knees and hairline. (Source: NLM)
2. Digestive and gastrointestinal issues – bloating, gas, abdominal cramps, chronic constipation, diarrhea, and IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) may be some of the issues related to gluten intolerance.
3. Delayed growth – children with abnormal weight and height gains may be suffering from gluten intolerance. Their body can’t absorb the nutrients needed for growth.
4. Joint pains – pain on joints, fingers and knees could be symptoms of gluten intolerance.
5. Depression, anxiety and mood swings
6. Chronic acne
7. Migraines and headaches
8. Brain fog
9. Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD)
10. Dizziness and off balance
11. Hormone imbalances
12. Tingling, swelling or numbness of fingers and toes

These are just some of the common symptoms found in people with gluten intolerance.

Here is a recording on Is Food Causing Your Health Problems? This recording will enlighten you about gluten intolerance and list more symptoms of gluten intolerance. I am sharing my own story here.

 

Not all grains have gluten. Being gluten intolerant doesn’t mean you avoid all grains. Popcorn, quinoa, amaranth, buckwheat, millet, sorghum, teff and oats (not contaminated when processed), rice and corn are naturally gluten-free. These grains are filled with minerals, vitamins, antioxidants and fiber. (Source: Time)

Even if you are not suffering from gluten sensitivity, these grains are nutritious and affordable. They can add to the variety of food in your pantry. A study done by Purdue University shows that quinoa has lower sodium content and is higher in calcium, phosphorus, magnesium, potassium, iron, copper, manganese, and zinc than wheat, barley, or corn. These are important minerals for growth and according to Nobel Prize winner Linus Pauling PhD., you can trace every sickness, every disease and every ailment to a mineral deficiency.

If you feel that you may be suffering from gluten intolerance, I suggest you have a food journal and write down what you eat for at least a month. For example if you have stomach cramps every time after eating pasta made of wheat or semolina, try eliminating pasta for at least 10 days and record your progress.

Read this article about food journaling – Top 10 Tips to Keeping a Food and Nutritional Journal for Total Wellness.

If you have any questions please leave it in the comment section below. I look forward to serving you.

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Why Do We Make Poor Choices?

I woke up from one of those dreams that are almost nightmares with this sense that I needed to write about it. I will share the weird details with you, but here is the interpretation I got out of it.

We all make poor choices. A Poor Choice by itself may not be bad especially if there are no consequences. But poor choices over and over again can lead us to dark places in our lives. The consequences of continuous poor choices could result in divorce, loss of a home or possessions, loss of friendships and family, loss of purity, loss of our own identity.

Those dark seasons of life are usually very stressful and could lead to anxiety attacks, heart disease, diabetes, rapid aging, and a variety of health problems. Sometimes these health problems wake us up to the fact that we are making poor choices… sometimes we never wake up until it is too late.

1. We are in a hurry.
Has this ever happened to you? You are in a hurry rushing to get something done and you intentionally or inadvertently make a bad decision. It can be a purchase you can’t afford or a job done poorly so you made a mistake.

2. We are busy.
Let’s face it at some level we are all busy. But when we let busyness take over our lives and our family’s lives we may end up making poor choices.

A perfect example is when we let busyness of our careers take priority over our immediate family, our own health, or even our relationship with God. I have to admit I lived like that for a decade. I lost friendships, had an extremely stressed marriage, poor health, and the list goes on. Busy isn’t bad as long as we keep our priorities in order, set boundaries in our lives, and give ourselves grace and downtime too.

3. We are hungry.
Sounds silly but allowing ourselves to get really hungry or even “starving” as they say can lead us to making poor food choices. The continuous pattern of drive-thrus for meals and eating whatever is available will lead you to a poor season of obesity and disease. If you are parent making these same decisions for what your kids eat, you will end up with more sickness than you want.

4. We want to follow the popular or successful people.
When we are in school we want to be like the popular kids, so we may act, do or even follow them into situations we shouldn’t be in. In adult life we may have this same tendency with following others who are successful. But when you are assessing a person of success you need to make sure they have success in all areas of the life you want to live.

They may have achieved a 6 figure a year or a month income, but ask yourself how is their marriage? How many hours a week are they working? Are they raising great kids?  Are they stressed out and overworked? Sadly we have seen first hand what happens when you let your career become an idol in your life or anything else for that matter. So don’t be fooled by success or popularity.

5. We are following our spouse’s decisions.
Now I know I am hitting a touchy subject here but stick with me. We can lose our identity when we make our spouse an idol in our lives. We may even enable our spouse to make poor choices and live unGodly.

6. We don’t want to be alone.
This can apply to many things. We may be hanging out with friends or family members that are making poor choices and we follow the crowd. We may allow someone to treat us poorly because we don’t want them to leave us.

7. We don’t realize we are lost.
In Alcoholics Anonymous, your first step to sobriety is recognizing that you are an alcoholic. If you are in a dark season due to poor choices, you may not even realize it. We have had periods of our lives where we were fooled into thinking they were great times. But after getting out of those “great times” we recognize how bad they really were.

8. We are scared to do something new.
This is a big one. We can stay in our poor choices because the better healthier choices are so foreign and new to us that we stay in FEAR. Don’t let FEAR control your life. Break out and do something new.

9. We think because everybody else is doing it then we are okay.
My husband said last night as we passed a cop and he was speeding… “Everyone else is speeding.” A simple analogy but the fact is you can still suffer consequences when you do what you know is wrong.

If you are in Christ, remember you are set apart, a light on a hill the salt of the earth. Don’t become like the people of this world. Instead, change the way you think. Then you will always be able to determine what God really wants- what is good, pleasing, and perfect. Romans 12:2 God’s Word Translation.

I hope the interpretation of my nightmare dream can help you. I know it was a WAKE UP CALL for me. I will be praying for your breakthrough from Poor Choices into more Peace and Joy in your lives.

Mary Starr Carter
the Total Wellness Doc and Mom

Tribute to Dr. Wayne Dyer

Wayne Dyer

Many were saddened to hear about the recent loss of the beloved Wayne Dyer.  Wayne was an author of many self help books, a presenter, lecturer, and gift to many. Although we may not have seen eye to eye on some of our beliefs, he was still instrumental in helping me get on the right track in my life.

When I was a young 24 years old I was first introduced to Wayne’s material in my Chiropractic college library. One day I discovered that my College Library had a special section of self help, motivational, and inspirational books on tape. I devoured it. What a wonderful distraction from Anatomy and Physiology, Neurology and Biochemistry that I spent most of my days studying. Ironically all that self help material would later be more beneficial and even profitable than most of my college learning.

Amongst the library’s special section was Wayne Dyer’s tapes. When I started my Young Living Business in 2000, my mentor gave me tape after tape with the direction to listen to it all the time. They helped me to make a shift in my thinking, gain some confidence and grow in business. But I am not going to lie- it also led me in directions that were not my highest and best. Granted I made the choices to walk down some of those roads and listen to other tapes and CDs that led me into confusion and deeper in poverty.  It wasn’t until I became Christian that I could eventual be strong enough in my own beliefs to listen to material and keep what I determined was good and leave the rest.

So we remember Wayne Dyer and an important instrument to my journey to success. I am grateful and humbled by his work and efforts to the world. And I love the fact that he loved Young Living Essential Oils… as seen by one of his Facebook posts. LOL!

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

My 13 Year Marriage Advice

anniversary

Today is my anniversary. On August 9, 2002 I said I do to my best friend Jay. It was a beautiful wedding, outdoor, with friends, family, dancing it was great. But I don’t think I realized that day what being married really meant.

That first year of marriage was rough. Dishonoring each other with our words and being disrespectful. Then we started setting up some better behavior standards. Still we could have huge blowouts. Five years after we got married we started getting some Biblical Marriage Training and it made a world of difference.

We got better, but better isn’t enough.

Conflict

This week I got to have a conversation with an Associate Pastor whose main job is counseling pre-marriage couples. He actually gets them fighting and helps them deal with conflict resolution and communication. I thought this was very very interesting. He also discussed the concept of constant evaluation. This conversation was at 3:20pm… little did I know I would be in conflict just less than 5 hours later.

Conflict can start so innocently. In my marriage it usually is from lack of communication, disrespecting, and or carelessness. Although I would like to say we never fight, we never dishonor each other, we never misinterpret what the other is saying, we never hurt each other… that would be a lie. And to be honest the more time we spend with each other the more opportunities we have for these things.

In many cases I am the culprit of the conflict. In this case I was careless with planning and prioritized other things over an important thing my husband wanted to do. I didn’t really LISTEN, I mismanaged things, and then once the opportunity was lost for him, I argued and didn’t listen again to his hurt.

See in conflict and during this time it didn’t matter what or why this thing happened it only mattered that he was trying to communicate to me that he was hurt, disappointed and frustrated. I made it all about me and how I felt once he was upset and really just didn’t listen at a level couples need to listen at.

Are you listening to your spouse? Are you really hearing them? Are you honoring their desires, wants, needs? Are they hearing you?

It may be time you invest in your marriage. Why not take a class together or by yourself? Go talk to a marriage counselor. Or maybe even do a marriage retreat together.

My 13 Year Marriage Advice

One thing I have learned from my years of marriage counseling is that if you listen and honor your spouse consistently they will do the same.

As for our conflict, well after a cooling and thinking period I realized what I did and how it hurt my husband. We talked about it, he shared his hurt and the reasons why this was important to him. I listened and sincerely apologized that my behavior led to his loss of opportunity. He forgave me and to show he forgave me, he handed over the one “good pillow” we both love to sleep on. Love is selfless. LOL!

“Marriage isn’t easy, but it is worth it.”

 

God Bless your Marriage,

Mary Starr Carter

the Total Wellness Doc and Mom

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Sometimes You Don’t Realize What You Lost

Have you been at a season in your life where you knew if you didn’t make changes the future might not have been too pleasant? You know a time when you knew if something didn’t change that you might have a heart attack, nervous breakdown, or worse. A time when you felt so stressed you could barely keep up with everyday activities. That was our family a year ago.

Wake Up Call

A year ago we were heading on an amazing adventure to France. We won this trip and were so excited but little did we know our bodies and lives were at a critical point. We enjoyed the adventure, met new friends, got to sit and have conversation with some incredible mentors and millionaires. But during the whole trip we were exhausted physically, overwhelmed emotionally, and simply not enjoying it as much as we could because of our physical health. We had a wake up call about our health and about our future.

Workaholics

See for more than 15 years we both had burned the candle at both ends. In fact 10 of those years you could all us workaholics. Although one lucrative business was developed, we lost a lot through that 10 year season. Then we got some training, had kids and found a bit more balance in our marriage and relationships but our health was still not a huge priority.

Releasing the Stressor

After that trip to France my husband made the decision to release his corporate 60 plus hour always on call job. Shortly after that we would both become pretty sick and I would have a miscarriage at 20 weeks. Our bodies didn’t immediately recover once the stress and grief lifted. We both carried 40 plus pounds of extra weight, struggled with anxiety, stress, and blood sugar regulation- he was worse than me. We finally had to wake up to the fact that years of high stress, irregular sleep patterns, and poor food habits led to where we were. The irony is we are in the health industry. Our job helps people get healthy. Go figure!

Both of us have released weight in the past, gotten on track with our exercise, eating and supplements. Last time for me was in 2012 prior to the pregnancy of my 2 year old and my husband in early 2013. We both lost more than 25 pounds, and we felt amazing, but weight is only a piece of good health. We have to look at the STRESS in our lives. STRESS can KILL US.

I want you to look at this picture of my husband. This is a picture of my husband in early 2014 when he was under a great deal of stress.

I am remembering that in 2014, I thought that if something didn’t change in his health he was going to die. I remember praying to God to help my husband get the motivation to be healthy again.

Here is Jay in August 2014 during our trip to France.

Jay Ice cream

In September Jay would let go of his job. It would take six months after releasing his stressful job, and 3 months after we had our loss that he would start to get his motivation back. He started researching what was going on with his health, we got some testing done, and he started to understand the toll that all these years of what poor lifestyle habits had done to his body. Because just getting rid of the stressor is not enough to heal the body, you now have to heal the damage.

Spring started a journey back to health for my entire family. Jay recognizes that he has at least 2 years of full healing ahead of him to regenerate hormonally, and physically into the man he desires to be.

At the end of June he got some serious motivation by the Iron Cowboy, one of the world’s best endurance athletes. Jay started competing in 5K runs.

This is him on July 4th 2015 after running a 5K race.

JayMckenzie

Stress is part of life, but how much you allow in your life and how you deal with it can affect you for years and years to come. You might be in a place where you have no motivation to start. I promise you if you take one small step each day even if it is researching the effects of stress and adrenal fatigue, in the beginning things will begin to change for you. Focus on the positive, speak life into your future, release the negative, and MOVE FORWARD each day. YOU CAN DO THIS!

 

God Bless your Health Journey,

Mary Starr Carter
your friend who is walking the journey back to wellness with you

 

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

50 Ironman Triathlons, 50 Days, 50 States: The Iron Cowboy

IronCowboykids

James Lawrence AKA The Iron Cowboy has been showing the world what the human body is capable of completing; 50 full triathlons in 50 states in 50 days. WOW, right? When James was 28 years old his wife Sunny challenged him to do a 4 mile “fun run”. He struggled to even finish. But Sunny believed in her husband and signed him up for a full marathon… WOW… he did it and little did he know his journey to be one of the world’s top athletes had begun. Fast forward more than a decade and the 50- 50-50 challenge has now broke his previous World Record of 30 Ironman distance races in one year. With this challenge, James the Ironman and his family are showing us much more.

Dream Big and Succeed

WeDreamWEBeleive

This picture is from a Facebook post of the Iron Cowboy’s Room where his wife Sunny posted this years ago. The 50-50-50 is pushing us all to look at our dreams and goals and push ourselves to DREAM BIG… If our Dreams don’t scare us then they aren’t big enough, his Facebook post said.

Get Healthy

uswithJamesFlorida

Change is Hard. Change is Really Hard. But the Reward is getting your life back. – James Lawrence

The Iron Cowboy 50-50-50 is encouraging all of us to get healthy. My family attended the Pensacola 5K with James along with other Young Living leaders. This was my husband’s first 5K run. In our conversations after the event with other successful business leaders, we all realized that our success and hard work had contributed to our weight gain and some unhealthy habits. We all had committed to get back on track and my husband was bit by the 5K bug. Eight days later he would run another 5K 4th of July Run. And then by coincidence we would be 40 minutes away from James’ 38th Ironman near Cleveland Ohio and we got to bring our friends and participate in that 5K run too. What a blast!

UswithJamesOhio

Moms pushing their kids in their jogging strollers, kids as young as 6 years old passing us, and even meeting some amazing success stories like Christian Crabtree who James coached and helped release more 100lbs. I was so excited.

Christianandme

Family First

ironcowboyfamily

One of the things I most admired about James’ journey is that he did it with his wife and kids. Can you imagine that summer vacation? WOW. Talk about endurance for the whole family. I can imagine it was extremely challenging, but in the events we got to witness we watched happy kids, running or biking with their dad, and loving on him when they could.

Jameseating

#FightTheFight Childhood Obesity

Children are a product of their environments. And us as adults and parents have that responsibility to make those changes to start eating healthy foods, to start being active. – James Lawrence

In 2012 according to the CDC more than 1/3 of children and youth were overweight or obese in the United States. Ironically as James addressed the crowd in Ohio about his fight against obesity, the kids swim meet right next to us was serving all kinds of junk food at it’s snack bar.

It’s not easy. It’s a choice. – James Lawrence

Jamespicbyjessakae

Pushing Past the Pain

You can view through the Facebook feed to find plenty of times when James was injured, he had toenails falling off, was exhausted physically and mentally. In fact I don’t think he got more than 6 hours of sleep most nights with the schedule and travel they had to do. I am sure he wanted to quit but he kept with it. His wife Sunny shared on Facebook how hard the travel was and her little one missing his dad. I am sure she wanted to quit too but she persevered.

ironcowboymassage

I was thankful to see some great chiropractors, massage therapists and physicians supporting James’ success. It takes a great TEAM to achieve the IMPOSSIBLE DREAM.

ylironcowboy

Young Living Supports the Iron Cowboy

Young Living Essential Oils was one of the biggest supporters of the Iron Cowboy. It was fun to see the Young Living bus, Slique van, and supplements the Iron Cowboy used while on his journey.

Here are a few posts from Facebook:

Everyday, twice a day, crucial for James’ success!!! – Facebook post

Jamessuccesssupplements

“Young Living products are a permanent part of my training, competing, and my family life,” says James. James has used them since 1994.

Jamesfood

ylironcowboyproducts

James Sets an Example

Although James’ 50-50-50 journey is over, his lasting impression, inspiration and memory will be set in the Guinness Book of World Records and throughout history. What he did to inspire us to get our kids and ourselves more active, to make fitness a family affair, and to make our health and the health of our children a top priority will remain with us for years to come.

swim

I will close with James’ words from his 50-50-50:

Hopefully I can lead by example and you are going to want to join me. Come swim a lap with me, come bike a mile with me.

What he started let us continue to exercise and live an active life for our family and our future.

running

Article by Mary Starr Carter aka The Total Wellness Doc and Mom. Inspiring others through her real life struggles and wins with infertility, healthy living, parenting and being a wife. Visit her on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/TheTotalWellnessDocandMom

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

What’s In A Name?

what's in a name?

That was what my friend said to me “What’s in a Name?” after a long awkward silence. See a few days earlier she said to her assistant that she regretted not getting a ticket to an important event. Within 3 days some tickets became available out of the blue and now she was able to go.

We were on the phone discussing it and she related the story to me and then said,  “Thank the Universe I am able to go”… After a long silence I awkwardly said Uhhha.  She said, “I know I know you think it is God I think it is the Universe what is in a name.” A WHOLE LOT, is what I wanted to tell her. I wanted to tell her about everything she was missing out on, on what it means to partner with God, about the Trinity and so on… but I didn’t she wasn’t ready yet to hear what I had to say.

I think as Christians we fall into 2 groups; the ones who love Jesus but mostly keep it to themselves and the ones that love Jesus and let the entire world know no matter if they are open to receiving your message. You probably know an example of both in your life. Very few people know how to share God with others in a way that doesn’t have them running away. Interestingly enough my business training has taught me how to share God with others in a more comfortable way. It starts with really caring about them, listening for their needs, developing relationships and sharing a message that is appropriate to what you are hearing when they are ready to hear it.

I am sure if my friend who believes in the Universe (which I believe means she believes in Creation and not the Creator) was ready to listen or ask me about my beliefs I would say the following:

Well you know Friend, I believe God is the Creator of all things including the Universe. I believe He sent His only Son not just to be a sign or a prophet but to be the ultimate sacrifice for us and through which we can find Salvation and a path to God. When Jesus died He left a Helper of sorts called the Holy Spirit here with us on Earth. The Holy Spirit directly allows us to access Wisdom, Strength, Insight, Power, Blessings, and Gifting from Heaven in our daily lives when we are Born Again. When I was Born Again meant I accepted Jesus into my heart I gained a new heart, but I must work to renew my mind. When I have TRUST in God and Wisdom and Guidance there is so much more Joy and Peace in life it’s really unexplainable.

Through studying the Bible and reading it cover to cover I started to understand the entire blessing that was in store for my life. The Bible is so full of Wisdom and direction for our lives.  The sad part is most people both non-Christians and Christians don’t read it. Non-Christians don’t read it because they read one thing that may have offended them or they disagree with. Christians don’t read it because they just don’t make the time. So we end up getting pieces and parts from novies like the Secret, Law of Attraction, books by Doreen Virtue, Marianne Williamson, A Class on Healing, business books like Think and Grow Rich and the list goes on. Some of these books are entire paraphrases of the Bible and others have only a few sound concepts of Truth. God’s book the Bible, is the originator of Success, Abundance, Personal and Professional Growth. Isn’t that funny?!

So Friend I don’t know, all I know is what I have experienced and the thousands of others who I know who follow Christ. Unimaginable Joy, Peace, Abundance, Love, it’s all here. I am sure you want to question a lot of things and I may or may not have the answers. But I do know that Accepting Christ takes a great deal of Faith. Accepting the gifts God has in store for you life takes a great deal of Courage. And renewing your mind and becoming the person you never thought you could be takes work. {Silence… let her process… don’t talk unless talked to.}

So that is the conversation I would have with my friend who said What’s in a name… when she is ready… I would say a similar message to you when you are ready. If you are Christian or not I would tell you God has a so many Blessings in store for you. A life you can’t even imagine when you fully TRUST HIM. I know I want all that God has for me and I want that for you too.

I love you, God loves you, and I am praying for you to embrace all you were meant to be.

Your friend,

Mary Starr Carter

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Do You Have A Big Dream?

big dream

Do you have a Big Dream?

I mean a dream bigger than getting out of debt and acquiring a lot of stuff.

Not a dream to win the lottery, but a dream that is the result of the work YOU do? A dream that scares you. A dream that makes you really uncomfortable. A dream that resonates from the bottom of your soul, a dream that’s no one else’s but uniquely yours. A dream that the Creator in Heaven put in your heart.  A dream that is part of your destiny. A dream that when you fulfill it, God will say, “Well done my good and faithful servant”.

Maybe you don’t have that dream… yet. You know it’s somewhere inside of you and you know it is starting to make itself clear. Maybe it involves writing or speaking. Maybe it involves helping people or serving others. Maybe it involves changing the way the world thinks. Maybe your dream is to build an orphanage. Invent a product that saves lives. Develop a teaching curriculum that helps disabled children learn. Become a coach that helps hundreds of families restore their relationships.

I believe that someday soon God will make a VISION so great in your life that it will take your breath away.  Are you ready for your FUTURE? YES or NO?

If your answer is YES or your answer is NO, I want you to consider something. 7 years ago I invested into some training I thought was going to improve my business, but that training didn’t just improve my business it changed my LIFE… How? It helped me get rid of struggle, strife, distrust, and discord in my life. It helped me take my marriage from okay to amazing. It helped me pay off $268,000 in debt in  56 months. It taught me how to serve more than 10,000 people and help them change their lives. It taught me how to have fun again. It helped me in so many ways we would be here all day talking about it.

So here it is www.firststepstosuccess.com in San Antonio Texas, August 29th – 30th.  If you are ready to get back on track with your life and relationships, if you are ready to open up to the purpose and vision God has for your life, if you are ready to learn systems, tools, and techniques that will take you farther in life that you can ever imagine, and if you are ready to have one of the most fun weekends of your life, then get yourself registered.

I love you and I hope you will make the choice that could help you get the vision for your BIG DREAM and learn how to make it happen.

God Bless your success,

Mary Starr Carter

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

 

My Advice to Those in Marriage or Thinking About Marriage

Yesterday I congratulated a friend on her upcoming marriage. She told me, “The wedding is off.” I was shocked but then she said, “I have to stick to my word. I told him a while back that the drinking had to stop. He stopped and then we got engaged. He started again and I couldn’t make a life commitment to that. I still love him, he’s my best friend but I can’t marry that.”

I thought to myself WOW what an incredibly amazing and strong woman. At the age of 30 she had made positive pro-active decisions that could result in avoiding a lot of heartache and hurt down the road or even divorce.

Christie, one of our employees is a young 30 something year old who has never been married. She desires a Godly man who accepts her fully including her healthy lifestyle. Since she works with our family very closely everyday she sees a lot of what marriage is like. I have encouraged and coached her on some particulars about marriage and about getting ready for a husband.

Here are a couple of those tips:

A way to a man’s heart is through his stomach…

I know it sounds cliché and old fashioned but I really think there is some truth to this. Christie has seen first hand what HANGRY (hunger making a person irritable) does in our house.

Having a regular eating schedule, planned meals, and healthy snacks available in the house are important. She sees that these things take time and planning but if we don’t do them then things don’t run as smoothly.

DECLARE WAR ON DEBT

They say weekly fights about money increase our risk of divorce. I walked into my marriage in 2002 with almost $200,000 in debt and then acquired another $100,000 in our first 5 years of marriage. Can you imagine 46% of your income going to debt?   That would mean half the week you work to pay off debt and the other half you are working to pay your basic necessitates like rent, electricity, phones and food. I think and know that could cause STRIFE in a marriage.

Imagine how much less stress a young couple will have with no EXTRA Debt payments monthly. It could be the difference in a spouse being able to stay home with the kids if they choose to and having to work full time.

MARRIAGE IS HARD

So my final advice to those in marriage or thinking about marriage is this:

Marriage is hard. For most of us there will be a time or times when you want to leave or give up. But don’t… learn to really listen. Learn to love yourself, learn to communicate honor and respect your spouse. And most of all pray for your spouse, pray for your marriage everyday. Prioritize your relationship with God first, spouse second, kids third, work and other stuff after that. Do those things and watch your marriage blossom.

 

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

A $100 Check in the Mail Gave Me Vision for My Future

A 15 year old dream became so much more:

Yesterday when I was cleaning out my office I found this letter I had written to my family and friends on December 23, 2000. Several days before I wrote that letter I received a check in the mail from Young Living Essential Oils for $100.

I was so excited to get this check because I was so broke and stressed out back then living on Food Stamps, Government Assistance and was a full time Chiropractic student. A year previous to this date I had attended my first Young Living home meeting where I ended up purchasing my first kit of oils.

From there I purchased oils every month and my mentor Kathy Kouwe helped me start to share the oils with my classmates. We didn’t know much about business, but I started sharing by doing the Raindrop Technique for people. After sharing with about 25 people, several people purchased oils and 2 started sharing with others and that is how I got a $100 check in the mail.

For me that $100 check was the inspiration I needed that gave me the VISION of how I would take care of my immediate needs and achieve my dreams. After I got that check I wrote down my GOALS for my personal life and business that I would achieve in the next 5 years. Simple things like having access to fresh grown foods and a local health food store within 30 minutes of where I lived to being able to pay my monthly student loan bill of $1500 with my Young Living commission checks.

I truly believed that the Young Living business opportunity would help me achieve those goals. And guess what? Not only did I achieve those goals but I did it in less than 5 years, and today 15 years later well I’ve BLOWN IT OUT OF THE WATER!

That $100 check gave me a vision of what my Young Living business could be for me.  Why? Because it met my immediate needs at the time. Not everyone will have a need for money. Not everyone will be motivated by money. Some people will be looking to improve their health. Some people will be looking for something that will give them personal satisfaction in helping others. Some people will be looking for a positive and uplifting social environment. A Young Living business can meet all those needs.

So my point is… FIND OUT what your prospective business owners NEEDS and WANTS are. Help them get the VISION of how a Young Living Business can help them achieve those needs and wants. Encourage them to set their goals, and make a plan to achieve those goals. When they achieve their goals help them set new ones and a new plan. Your business is ever evolving, but the basic thing you do is HELP PEOPLE and in that you also get to help them MAKE THEIR DREAMS COME TRUE.

I am so very grateful for my Sponsor/Enroller Mentor Kathy Kouwe who helped me make my dreams come true! I am grateful for the hundreds of Associate Team Members who work this business with me and the almost 10,000 people we serve. We get to help people, help our families, make money, and have so much fun doing it. WOW. WOW.

WOW.

Read my Dec 23, 2000 letter to my family below. And if you are ready to get started in a Young Living Home Business, call our office at 1-888-351-6850 we would be happy to help you develop a plan to achieve your goals.

————————

12/23/00

Dear Friends,

They say that goal setting is very important to success. I agree, so 2 days ago I sat down and wrote a list of things I want to have in five years. The list included my optimal living situation in five years. It states how much net profit I will make, how I will spend my professional and personal time and what I want to have near by. I believe that the entire list is attainable in only five years by building up my capital and setting smaller goals to obtain my large ones.

In the past year I have become more health conscious, expanding my ideals beyond but always including chiropractic to obtain optimum health. These things include nutrition (supplementing with vitamins and minerals and diet changes), cleansing and detoxifying my system, different forms of healing including energy work like Reiki and Acupuncture and finally essential oils.

The latest fad is herbal medicines, but just imagine if tons of herbs were distilled down to only the purest-compounds. How much more effective would they be. That is what essential oils are, they are the pure derivatives of plants, trees, flowers, roots, and seeds used to make a particular essential oil; I was lucky to be introduced to the purest brand called Young Living Essential Oils. There are no added chemicals or fillers and the plants are organically grown unlike health food stores brands.

What I initially saw as a negative part of these oils will now bring the swift success of my Chiropractic business. See- you cannot buy Young Living Oils in a Health Food Store because it’s company is network based. Agggh I know what you are thinking and I agree, I have worked in other network businesses with no success but in a year just from using my oils I have gone from making 10 dollars a month to 100 dollars doing nothing. I bought a kit of 7 oils and started using a little at a time for         , to help me sleep, for congestion, for a    and p      , then I started taking some of the supplements for cleansing the digestive tract. Soon I started using the oils with my Reiki sessions for detoxification and balancing the body. I make 30 dollars a session for that and it has truly been keeping me above water.

I kept thinking to myself what a successful Chiropractor I will be but at the same time wondering how will I finance myself. My loan payments monthly will be $1,500 dollars. Then it came to me my oil business will propel me. It fits perfectly into-my future in the health profession I will help patients reach optimal health.

So I am asking your help. I understand that many of you have no need for the oils in your life and that is fine. But all of you know someone who lives with pain or distress and has not gotten relief from standard medical procedures. I truly believe that Chiropractic is the least invasive-form of relieving our body’s biomechanical and neurological dysfunction. But I also know there are limitations to matter when someone has had a problem for years and we are not the answer for all dysfunction. Why not try something else that is very unobtrusive like essential oils. Pass on this information to a friend who suffers from      . They may want to know that there are choices less harmful than                      . By passing this information on to them you may be helping them more than you know. And you will help a friend or relative build a health care business.

Wishing you health and happiness this holiday and all year long.

Love,

Mary Starr Parmley
Student Doctor of Chiropractic, Health Educator, Reiki Practitioner, Essential Oil Distributor #310872

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

A Time for Everything

a time for everything

There is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven: A time to be born and time to die. Those words from Ecclesiastes are ringing true in my life this week. How about yours?

Last Wednesday an amazing man and colleague Jay Leek was taken back to Heaven suddenly. Our hearts grieve this loss and for his beautiful wife Janie and family but we are grateful we know without a doubt he is with Jesus now.

On Monday I read a Facebook post of an acquaintance with cancer about their decision to call in Hospice (end of life care). His wife had just lost their elderly mother in law the week before and now were calling in Hospice for him. Your heart grieves for them, but again I know there is a peace of where he is going.

At 9pm that same night I received a phone call from my friend letting me know that our Spiritual Mama who also has cancer was admitted to the ER with confusion and disorientation. And they now found that the cancer has spread to the brain.

Our hearts hurt to think we may possibly lose this incredible woman much sooner than expected. The work she has done has brought thousands closer to Christ and she will have great treasures in Heaven. The second I hung up the phone from that conversation I received this text picture from a friend.

pregnancy stick

A Time to Be Born and a Time to Die… how true are those words? The hard part is acceptance. Acceptance that we may not have the ones we love with us forever, acceptance that we may not enjoy our retirement or glory years with our spouse, acceptance that the baby we so desperately want may not be here in our timing.

JennieGagefamily

These are my friends Jennie and David Gage and their family. At first glance you would think the Lord has blessed them with a quiver full of children… which he has in a way.

God led Jennie and David to adopt these blessings, but they personally have dealt with infertility for 22 years. The baby they are holding is baby Harmony and she is their 22 year old miracle baby.

WOW how cool is God? Talk about waiting on the Lord. And as an added bonus in the same month Harmony was born, the Gage family was blessed with a new financial blessing of becoming a Silver in Young Living which increases the family’s monthly income quite a bit.

“God has made everything beautiful in its time.”

My point I guess is that there is a season for all things and we must WAIT on the Lord in all things.  The end of life is a season, the beginning of life is a season and there are so many in between.  Trust in God, Rest in His Mercy, Follow His Guidance, Wait Patiently, and most of all have Faith.

Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.  – Hebrews 11:1

Thought you might enjoy this song.

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Say No to Divorce

Say No to Divorce

I was so happy to hear my friend announce at lunch that she had made the commitment to work on her marriage. Married for more then 20 years with 2 kids out of the house, she and her husband had some rough years recently. Financial stresses, alcohol, health and differences in lifestyles were pulling them apart.

One person was getting healthier and healthier and the other no so much. One person had energy and vitality and the other not so much. Do you ever feel like this, that your spouse isn’t at the same place as you are in life? That they aren’t interested in the same things you are? It becomes easier to pull apart and become more like roommates than a married couple.

The thing is marriage is a covenant. That means we made a solemn promise under God to be One, for better and worse, in sickness and in health, in richer and in poorer…

Ever wonder why those words are in most marriage vows? They are real. All marriages will deal with better times and worse times, sickness and health, richer and poorer. Now granted all of the choices we make definitely contribute to the state of our marriage. Making good choices by both parties is a key to having a marriage full of love. Make bad choices or become complacent in working on your marriage and you will have a marriage full of frustration, anger, and fighting.

I may have only 13 years of marriage under my belt but I understand the good and the bad of marriage. I have been in marriage coaching for 6 years and understand the consistent work it takes to have a good marriage. My husband and I don’t have an outstanding marriage yet but we have a good marriage. So I am going to share my tips on having a good marriage and avoiding divorce.

IT STARTS WITH YOU
1. Be the best you
If you really want to work on your marriage it starts with working on you.  We must be the best ME we can be to have the best marriage we want.

This includes taking care of your health. Recently both my husband and I had some blood tests done from www.zrtlabs.com. We found out that both of us are hormonally challenged right now. This helped us tweak our food, exercise, supplements and essential oils health program to support ourselves. Things like low libido, lack of energy and motivation may be a hidden hormonal challenge. So why not get things checked out.

HONOR YOUR SPOUSE

2. Learn your spouse’s love language
If you want to really love your spouse like they need to be loved, learn their love language and stop giving love only like how you like to receive it.

the 5 love languages

The 5 Love Languages book by Gary D Chapman

Photo credit

3. Learn about your spouse’s personality
SOOOOOOO VERY IMPORTANT… if you want to be together for 50 plus years you must learn to communicate and understand your spouse’s personality.

GEMS® Mastery

Make Having a Successful Marriage a Priority

4. Make your marriage a priority
Most marriages fall apart because we have made other things a priority over the marriage. If each of you makes God your number 1 priority followed by your marriage, you will have much less risk of divorce after the kids are out of the house.

People who make their children the highest priority and their marriage a least priority find they don’t even know each other once the kids are gone or worse end up divorced.

5. Date night
The best examples of happy marriages I have in my life all have this in common: DATE NIGHT. My grandparents and my aunt and uncle are 2 examples where they each forced themselves to go on a date once a week. Even with small little kids at home, exhausted from work, no desire to go out, no money, they still made it a rule to get out and once they did they had a blast.

My grandma told me they would sometimes have to find change in the couches to get enough money to go to the movies or have one cocktail out.  My aunt and uncle had a life where he worked out of town for 3-4 days a week so their Thursday night dates were really important to reconnect and share. My grandparents have been married 60 years and my aunt and uncle 30 years. I don’t know but I think they are doing something right.

FORGIVENESS

6. Forgiveness
Forgiveness is an essential piece of a happy marriage. Learn how to forgive and do it regularly. For the little things that build up like forgetting to take out the trash to forgetting to get you a card for Mother’s Day to worse things.  And yes worse things will happen. In those cases you will need to ask God to help you forgive, to heal your heart, and to heal your marriage.

Is having a good marriage easy? No, but is it worth it? YES!

So get out there, learn, and invest time and effort into your marriage.

YOU CAN DO THIS! I am praying for your marriage success!

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Do You Have Vision For Your life?

Freedom hands

Do you have Vision for your life? I’m serious. What are your hopes and dreams for your future? If money didn’t matter what would you be doing with your life? Do you want to be happily passionately married in 5- 10-20 plus years, what about your children, finances? Where do you want to live, explore, vacation or see? How many people do you want to help, serve, change their lives?

Is it hard for you to give answers to these questions? Don’t feel bad. It was and still is for me. Recently I attended a First Steps to Success Conference where I had a radical awakening. I realized that although I go to work everyday, I help lots of people, and what I do matters I still had no vision for most areas of my life.

Me Annointed

Maybe you feel the same way.  Maybe because you are deep in debt, your job doesn’t pay great, you can’t dream outside your financial issues. Maybe you have little kids, are a single parent, or have a stressful job or life and you feel like it’s hard just getting through the day let alone do anything else.

I think maybe that is how I felt. Overwhelmed by the thought of dreaming bigger, doing more, or maybe I didn’t want to get my hopes up on something that may never happen.

Maybe you have allowed friends or family members to crush your dreams. “That’s nice but those things don’t happen for people like us”,  “You are too old to do that”,   “You’d have to win the lottery to make things like that happen”. Have you heard those kind of things before?

Me too. In fact I had a close family member say to me after I started my Young Living business, “That’s nice but those things really don’t work out for people, there’s no way you can earn that much.”

Well let’s just say I didn’t let her words stop me and I have proven them quite wrong.  How did I do it? It actually started with just a dream to be able to pay my monthly student loan bills with my Commission checks… then car payments, rent, living expenses, then replace my husband’s income and it has grown from there. But you also have to understand that when you are comfortable living the life you dreamed of having you may still be missing a VISION for your life.

Without VISION we cannot be our best selves. Without VISION we will not grow, we will let life happen to us versus living life by design. I am just sharing what I learned at a recent www.firststepstosuccess.com training. Here is another snippet:

“Where there is no vision there is no commitment. Where there is no commitment there is no focus. Where there is no focus there is no ownership or personal responsibility. Where there is no ownership there is no sacrifice or endurance. Where there is no sacrifice or endurance there is no true success.”

Vision

I had a realization about what I was missing after that statement but it wasn’t until after a Spiritual Equipping session where I was anointed and prayed over that I had a HUGE deliverance. It was like scales had been lifted off of my eyes, heaviness off of my shoulders, and the wall came down. I was free again… sounds weird maybe, but I believe there is a Spiritual Enemy out there who does not want us to have Vision.  Who understands that without Vision there is no direction or focus and without Vision we will stay in our comfort zone.

Let’s get out of the rut. Let’s get out of the comfort zone. Let’s break free from something that is holding us back. Let’s get Vision back in our lives.

I will be praying for your deliverance too. I am also going to suggest that you do more than dream but learn to take action on your steps. I am using the Time Secrets Program to help me… you can check it out here.

God Bless your success,

Mary Starr Carter

crying woman
Where there is no vision there is no commitment.

Where there is no commitment there is no focus.

Where there is no focus there is no ownership or personal responsibility.

Where there is no ownership there is no sacrifice or endurance.

Where there is no sacrifice or endurance there is no true success.

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

How Important The Mom Is

I live between two worlds: The world of Stay At Home Mom and the World of Working Mom. I am self employed working varying hours from 25-35 hours a week.  I have an amazing Home Helper, which I guess I should call Nanny but there is such guilt with that word.

When we choose to work and have someone else take care of our kids it’s hard on the mom especially. You pray for someone who will love your kids with their whole heart, that will have your value system, honor your parenting rules and just be a great person.

And then when you get it you struggle with watching your kids love someone that isn’t you. When your kids are little you may even have to hear them call their Sitter Mama… that’s hard. If you work too much then you will be exhausted when you get home and your kids will see you as the boring old mom and your daycare or Sitter as the fun one.

I’ve learned over the past 5 years it’s all a balance. I have had periods where I have had no help and periods where I had a ton of help. You learn to be a parent by default or design no matter what your circumstance. Default just lets life happen, design understands God’s intention for your work.

Whether you are a single parent, working parent, or stay at home parent you can be a parent by design. God has given you this responsibility of grooming your children, and caring for their needs. We cannot have guilt or compare ourselves to other moms who might stay at home. We are all different and we all have different strengths.

Keeping your family as a higher priority over your work doesn’t necessarily mean you are a stay at home mom. For working moms you can design your life so that you can be valuable in your work and valuable at home.

I think it starts with the journey of being our BEST SELF. God has given us a great PURPOSE… and that is Grooming our Children for Success. Raising strong, caring, independent, self disciplined children into young adults. In order to do this we must be our own strong independent, self disciplined, responsible, caring BEST SELVES. This may start with taking a strong look at our own stuff.

I was blessed this past weekend to get an AWAKENING of areas I needed to work on.  I attended www.firststepstosuccess.com. If you are looking for help in getting your life in order, being a better you and a better parent I highly encourage you to check it out.

Remember, being the best mom doesn’t equate to how many school events you went to, or how many gifts you gave your children. Being the best mom starts with being the best you so that you can love, honor and help to grow children who can be their best selves too.

God Bless you MOM.

I am rooting for you!

P.S. Here is a little comic relief with a Statistical WAKE UP CALL to How Important the Mom Is.

working-mom_page_2014

stay-at-home-mom_page_2014

Note to Family:

Mommy’s leaving for a little bit but don’t worry I have hired the following crew to take my place while I am gone:

Dietitian – to menu plan healthy and delicious meals
Cook – to prepare and cook all those meals
Nutritionist – to fill in all the gaps in your nutrition with the right supplements
Nurse – to assess and bandage when someone gets hurt, bit, bumped or bruised but you seem to get hurt daily these days
Kisser – to kiss all your Boo Boos
Essential oil expert – to make sure you have the right oils for all your ailments
Massage Therapist – to rub down your sore muscles and massage oils on your feet and back at night
Driver – to take you to your classes and fun events
Dish Doer – because at 2 and 5 your dish doing still has a lot to be desired
Laundry Helper – a must helper because we know Joshua you have this thing for clean pajamas
Cleaning Lady – so mommy doesn’t come home to a disaster
Grocery Shopper – with the amount of food this family eats this position is primary
Stylist – because we can’t have you going out with mismatched and backwards clothes
Singer – to sing your favorite songs to you
Bathroom Patrol – to make sure toilet seats don’t have pee on them, teeth get brushed and hands and faces get cleaned
Librarian – to pick the best books and read to you daily
Teacher – to continue your learning and school work
TV Monitor – to make sure we aren’t watching more TV than we should
Seamstress – to mend and sew your clothes… not that mommy does that now
Gardner – to have fresh foods daily

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

You Are Stronger Than You Think You Are

You Are Stronger Than You Think You Are

You are stronger than you think you are. We have all heard that saying some time in our lives. Usually we hear it during the trials, losses, and serious challenge we are going through from a friend or counselor.

Every week I meet women and men who have been going through some of life’s most exhausting and trying experiences. People who have lost life long jobs, suffered terrible health challenges, lost a spouse or a child. I listen to stories that would make you cry in an instant. But then some of these same people make me realize how strong one person can be.

Yesterday I was doing a business coaching with a girl friend who lost her husband 2 years ago. If ever I thought she was a strong person before now I see a new strength beyond my imagination. See 10 years ago she began using Young Living Essential Oils products for her own health challenges. She practiced, learned, studied, and grew her knowledge for natural health. She got her life and health back.

But then her husband was diagnosed with lung cancer and given weeks to live. She took all that knowledge and learning about natural health, applied it, and extended his life 16 months. He passed in a very peaceful way.

After a year of adjusting and grieving she made the decision she wanted and needed to grow her Young Living Business. For 12 months my friend has been diligent and focused, which got her results. But since the beginning of the year she has a new fire under her. A fire to improve her own life’s situation and a fire to help others “change their lives”.

Listening to her focused determination and watching as she learns new and difficult business and online skills makes my heart cry. Things that 2 years ago she would have just asked her husband to do she now was learning and doing. She is stronger, smarter, braver than she ever thought she was and she is living that out everyday.

the struggle you are in today

That same evening I called a woman looking at doing Young Living as a business to create financial stability and retirement. She too has had some very difficult challenges in her life and is looking to change her circumstances. I was overcome with admiration for this single woman who is ready to change her life. She spoke a positive word I want to share with you all.

She has been a massage therapist for 18 years and in her practice she realizes that instead of using the word healing which reflects we are overcoming a disease instead she uses the words: “TO MAKE WHOLE”. Wholeness is really the path we are seeking right? I thought that was neat.

Creating Whole Health is a physical, emotional, spiritual, financial, social journey.   In Young Living Essential Oils we have the opportunity to use the products and business to create “Whole Health”.

The skills we will learn along the way can transform us as a person. The skills aren’t always easy to learn, the Young Living business itself is simple but not always easy.  But when life’s challenges come up, we may be better prepared because of the journey we have been on.

I know that Young Living has helped me to be a WHOLE and better person than I ever thought or dreamed I could be. I know that what I learned along the way has helped me personally when I have been at my darkest times. I know that it has also helped thousands of other Young Living business owners become Whole again too.

winne the pooh

If you are looking for a path to Wholeness I hope you will consider calling our office to set up a time and see if the Young Living products or business journey may be right for you. Our office number is 1-888-351-6850.

If you are already in business and struggling with success there may be two different areas you want to work on: Working in your Business Skills and your Personal Development Skills. These skills have changed my life in every way.

Two trainings I recommend are the following:

Business Skill Development: The 60 Day Business Intensive

Personal Development Training: www.danijohnson.com
First Steps to Wealth book
First Steps to Success Training
Gems Mastery
Magnetic Influence

 

God Bless your journey to WHOLENESS,

Mary Starr Carter
the Total Wellness Doc and Mom

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Marriage Exercise: 101 Things That I Love About My Spouse

marriage exercise

Let’s face it- marriage is not easy. A joy-filled loving marriage is even harder to develop. Many couples are more like roommates than happily, passionately in love with their spouse. How does this happen?

I recently heard a friend say when I commented about the lack of time he and his wife have together, “Well when you have been married as long as we have it just works.” I felt sad about that comment.  I felt sad because I know it doesn’t have to be that way.

I know because I have examples in my life of couples married over 40 or even 50 years who still love each other deeply and want to spend quality time with each other.

So how do we stay or grow to fall in love with our spouse even deeper? I came up with this Marriage Exercise while on my own weekly date night the other night. I think it can help you fall more passionately in love with your spouse too.

Our tendency as humans is to focus on the faults, annoying things, frustrations, angers, and past hurts of our spouse. And the fact is daily our spouse could be hurtful, annoying, frustrating, or make us angry. So how do we change our focus and mindset? I think I found an answer.

This is an exercise I did the other day just for fun on one of our date nights. We had an hour drive and I thought I am going to tell my husband 101 ways why I love him.

Quite honestly at first I thought it was going to be difficult and that I maybe could get to 20. But then something happened once I focused on all the things I love about him. I started being reminded of more things that he has done or traits he has that I love. It was really fun. I was speaking LIFE into my husband.

And then as I got towards the end I started telling him things that I love about him that has not happened yet. It was like speaking a prophetic Word into his life. And the results surprised me.

When we got home that night he was so loving and caring for me (and not just because it was date night). See when you have little kids, a business to run, and health challenges you know that by the end of the day you are exhausted and sometimes impatient and probably not so loving feeling. But it was like the Words I spoke over my husband gave him energy, love, and the ability to feed me “caring and love”.

It was awesome… and when he did something later that was a little frustrating instead of getting frustrated and upset I focused on why I love him and told him some. It diffused the bad emotions and brought in the good.

So I don’t know if this exercise will work for you but why not try it.

1. Get your journal and start with 10 reasons you love your spouse.

2. When you get to 10 keep going and see how far you can get… here are a few ideas:

Think about his/her talents, qualities, physical features you love, things they have done you have been proud of or things they have done for the family or you. Their way with your children.

3. Now think about their dreams and goals and write down reasons you love them as if they have achieved those dreams and goals. Make sure they are their dreams or at least your mutual dreams together. For example:

I love you because you worked so hard to get healthy and you did it.

I love you because you have helped our family get out of debt.

I love you because you have created a legacy for our children.

4. Now go test a few of these things out with your spouse. Make sure they are in a space for listening and receiving your words. Sometimes you might have to write them a letter or card.

Let me know how it goes. It may sound silly to you because you just aren’t in that happy place with your marriage or maybe like my friend you have been married a long time, but WHY NOT just try it. What do you have to lose? And keep trying it.

Give your spouse Words of Love and Encouragement for the next 10 days and see what happens. And if you are still struggling, try Shutran essential oil blend. It is beautiful romantic cologne or perfume that can be worn daily, diffused or just saved for special nights that can help you both feel more loving. We love SHUTRAN.

I will pray for your success and awesome changes in your marriage. For more tips about Having a Happy Marriage, visit my friends who have been married a LONG time and coach thousands of people on how to have a QUALITY marriage, Drs. Jack and Lavonne Atnip on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/TheEncouragementCenter.

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Website Changes: Let Me Know What You Think

I’m having an identity crisis. I am 40 years old and I have been a Health Trainer for 19 years, a Home Business Developer for almost 16 years, a wife of 14 years, a mom for 5 years, a Homeschooler for 4 months. But years of experience doesn’t always equate to wisdom so let’s look at my results.

19 years training others in Health and Wellness = More than 10,000 helped

16 years in working a Home Business = Our team services 10,000 customers, we do millions in sales annually, we personally have a business that employees 3 full time and 5 part time staff, and most importantly we have almost 1000 team member associates successfully growing their businesses and commissions

14 years of Marriage + 7 years of monthly Marriage Coaching + Hard Work = Healthy Happy Marriage

5 years of Parenting + Many books read + Biblical Parenting Mentors + Healthy Choices = Healthy Kids who are growing to know and love Jesus

4 months Homeschooling = Still finding our Groove

Then there are all the hard lessons and life challenges that I have experienced from acquiring a quarter of a million in debt, recovering from work-a-holism, being pregnant more than 30 of the last 60 months, losing 4 babies back to heaven, gaining 30 pounds, dealing with adrenal fatigue, moving to a whole new area and climate.

And also all the fun stories and miracles I have gotten to witness or experience from helping my patients over come Health Challenges and Disease, Home Births, Financial Breakthroughs, and Lives changed.

See I am struggling with what I am going to share with you on my website. I hear God calling me out of my shell. I want to re-design my website to be a more accurate reflection of who I am now. Who we are… as a family, as entrepreneurs, as a couple, as parents, as business owners, as employers, as debt eliminators, as individuals who are finding solutions to their health challenges… as real people. I know we are being called to help more people with our challenges and experiences .

So what do you think? Are you up for a little bit of a change and look to my website? Honestly my newsletters will probably remain the same because I think I have been doing this already. But I want to commit to giving you more consistent quality.

So let me know what you think. Here are some areas I am thinking about writing about and organizing in my website.

Marriage
Coaching
Date Night
Sex
Say No to Divorce

Kids
Littles
Feeding Kids
Homeschooling
Bedtime
Doctor Mom

Faith
Finding Faith
Inspiration
Music
Biblical Wisdom

Health
Essential oils
Fitness
Dis-eases
Food
Supplements

Finances
Getting Out of Debt
Financial Preparedness
Recommended Trainings
A Poverty Mindset
A Wealthy Mindset

Home Business
Benefits of a Home Business
Getting Started in a Home Business
Our Home Business
Home Business Tips
Work With Us

Fun
Family Fun
With Friends
At Work
With Fitness
Vacations

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Live Blood Analysis Videos

They say seeing is believing. And I have to say there is some truth to that. When I talk to a client about health and what their food and life choices are doing to their body, they understand a little bit. But most of the time if they aren’t experiencing any symptoms of dis-ease they are not as motivated to get healthy. Myself included in that statement.

But what if you could actually see inside your body? What if you could see the health of your body?

Live Blood Analysis also called Nutritional Blood Analysis is the use of a Dark Field Microscopy to look at your blood. The use of a simple finger prick allows the technician to sample a drop of blood putting it on a slide to be analyzed immediately. Although it has been discredited by Wikipedia, Main Stream Medicine and others, many Conservative also labeled “Alternative” Practitioners and I believe that it is a very useful tool.

Not only have I studied Hemotology, I also interned in a blood lab for 6 months looking at many slides of blood. I learned a lot about what the different shapes of the RBC meant, what Iron Deficiency may appear like and what white blood cells and fat look like in the blood. I know that everything that this technician stated was valid. In addition, the video of the 46 year old male is my husband who I have also seen his blood work and guess what… it validates these findings.

I just read 31 year old woman Christie’s lab work about 6 months ago and it too validated what her Live Blood Analysis stated.

So we will never be able to say this is a medical diagnosis because it’s not (as long as Big PHARMA is around)… oh did I just say that? But it is a useful tool for everyone. It is extremely affordable for the information you get to visually see for less than 100 dollars.

And I know for myself that following just some of the nutritional recommendations from my previous analysis on January 11, 2014 improved my results.

When you SEE, you believe. So why don’t you check out these videos and see for yourself:

Joshua Truman 4 years old

April 2015:   One year later we see some improvement in iron deficiency but we has increased Fungus and yeast build

up evident in the blood.  My son has not been a great eater this year.  He doesn’t eat a ton of junk food, but he has not been as

good at eating veggies.  After this I am reducing the amount of fungus forming foods in his diet including Bananas, Peanut Butter,  and wheat.

He has had some cases of eczema and I believe it may have been related to the fungus.

JTCbloodApril2015

31 year old Female Zyto Compass and Live Blood Analysis Agree

April 2014 — below

UPDATE: April 2015  Live Blood Analysis is much improved with free floating cells, round cells, no anemic cells, much decreased fungus.  Christie for the past 6 months has cleaned up her diet eating no sugar, little to no gluten or white or wheat and no junk food.  She has been diligent in following her nutritional supplement protocols including increasing her NingXia Red, Green (Iron) Supplement, Probiotics, eating a Yeast Free Diet, and taking essential oils internally.  Her HARD WORK PAID OFF.

46 year old Male Poor Diet and Lack of Exercise

Live Blood Analysis for the Total Wellness Doc and Mom

 

 

 

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Anoint My Head with Oil

Have you wrestled with how to use essential oils

Biblically when the New Age Influence is so strong?

Live Webinar May 5, 2015

In this refreshing discussion – completely free from either paranoia or obsession – your hosts will frankly, and openly discuss what place essential oils have in today’s Christian homes. The New Age movements counterfeits have long kept Christians bound in fear and unwilling to use God’s natural remedies. Your hosts will help you understand what is fraudulent, and how the New Age movement is actually imitating something real. Our job is to search out the real, and to not take part in the counterfeit

We do not need to operate in fear, or reject what God has created because the enemy has tried to taint it. We need to claim what is ours and use what God created for us as good.

The Bible frequently speaks of anointing, ointment, and perfume. What does it mean? How does this fit into our modern lives?
Find out more and register for FREE today! Limited seating available, register soon!

With Love,
Kayla

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Happy 5th Birthday Joshua Truman Carter

JoshBeach

Dear my son Joshua Truman Carter,

Today you turn 5 years old and I want to write you a special note of memory about your past year so we never lose it. I am not one for scrapbooks but I can write so this is what I will do.

You have grown into a little man this past year. At least 5 inches, you tower over others your same age and it appears you will be tall like your Uncle Starr, but not if you don’t start eating more vegetables.

JoshuncleStarr

You are still as loving as you were when you were a baby and toddler. You love to snuggle in the morning, you still like to be carried like Sissy at 40 pounds but our backs only allow that once in a while. You grow more and more handsome everyday.

JoshieBlanket

We have always known you were brilliant but that you like to do things in your own timing. Right after your 4th birthday you started talking all the time, sentences and then more. You had not been much of a talker prior to that and now you communicate very well telling us what you want, your opinions, and concerns.

You still like peace and quiet but your Sissy doesn’t give you a lot of that always loving on you calling you JoshJosh. You love her very much and sometimes call her KAKA as her pet name.

JoshSarahPopcorn

After your 4th birthday you finally started “Pooping on the Potty” THANK YOU GOD.  You definitely made us patiently wait for that, but the Potty Chart along with Nana’s promise if you started pooping on the Potty we would go to see Mickey Mouse seemed to motivate you to new levels of Full Potty Training. I still have the voicemail of you excitedly telling me, “I Poopied on the Potty” when I was away. We and others who loved us prayed for your Potty Training and it worked. THANK YOU GOD.

JoshYoungLiving

June, July and August you spent your first summer in the Florida heat. We had a little blow up pool for you and you loved playing in it and going to the park with water spouts everywhere. You get so sad when we go to the park and there are no kids there, you love playing with friends.

JoshSwinging

This is a picture of a special friend of yours Arianna. Arianna spent 10 months away from her mommy and daddy because they were deployed. And now she will go to live in Japan and you may never see her again so I thought I would post this picture of her for you. So you can always remember and pray for her.

JoshArianna

You got to play with your cousins more this year. You had a lot of fun with Will and you two love to wrestle. Although it is nerve racking to watch, I am understanding the importance of letting you be “Wild at Heart” and not suppressing your boy or manhood.

Joshfishing

We got to go on our first official family vacation to Orlando this year and it was so much fun! We stayed at a time share with a pool right outside our window and a park. We went to our first costume party and you had a blast dancing and having fun. You are such a sweet and loving boy. Nana came and spent the day at Disney World with us. You got to see Mickey Mouse but I think your favorites were the Epcot Aquarium and the Epcot laser lights show and fireworks.

JoshAquarium

We all loved seeing your face light up throughout the day. What fun! After Disney World your imagination took off. You love to play act stories and have fun.

fireworksjosh

Speaking of play, your favorite things to do in your playroom this year was to cook food for us. You would set these elaborate tables of food up for us and it was so neat to see you cook. Your dad and I think you may have culinary arts in your future. As you almost turn 5 years old your play is changing some and cars and different obstacles.

JoshDominos

In February we went to see Nana and the manatees. You loved that special day even though it was so simple and no money spent. You still Thank God almost every night for the manatees, Nana, swimming and Grandma and Grandpa. I am learning and am thankful that simple things make you happy. Going for walks, riding the cart with MawMaw, picking up sticks with dad. Moving to Florida and living in the country has been really great for your development.

JoshiManatee

Grandpa Starr gave you your first Dr. Seuss books this year and you loved them. We read them just a couple of times and now you can almost read them by yourself. You have an extremely good memory like your daddy and we both suspect your intelligence is quite high. Many nights you fall asleep with your books.

Joshbooksasleep

We made the decision that our family is going to home school and we picked Sonlight books to start your path. You don’t like to sit very long but a good book can keep you engaged well. I decided based on Grandpa’s Starr’s advice from 30 plus years teaching boys, my research and mom intuition to start your schooling a little bit later. Make it fun, not to long and not too structured at first. I want you to fall in love with learning and so far it’s been great.

JoshReading

It’s hard to do things differently then everyone else. It’s hard to see other kids already writing and reading but then I remember that God’s calling on our lives and our children is to be set apart. You are set apart Joshua don’t forget you are the firstborn. Your sister follows you, friends will follow you and some day many people will follow your example. It will be hard to be different then the crowds but you are and will be a GREAT MAN. Here is a picture of you and daddy when you were 2 years old.

JoshJayGarden

After Thanksgiving your daddy and mommy got pretty sick and your baby brother Gabriel Daniel went back to heaven. You have 2 brothers and 2 sisters in heaven now Rachel, Jesse, Lauren Elise, and Gabriel. Gabriel’s passing was the hardest on all of us and you showed your sadness through acting out some and breaking out in an eczema on your face and nose. We also realize foods affect you and giving you Omega’s, NingXia Red and a protein shake daily seems to make a world of difference in your behavior.

JoshSarahDishes

This past fall your daddy made a very brave and important decision for our family. He decided that he needed to be here for us and for you, much more than he had been.  He made the hard decision to leave cooperate America. It was very difficult for him but you are a main reason he did.

God has called him to groom you into an amazing man. To be very active in your life, to guide you and direct you toward Jesus. God had to take your daddy to place where he could understand that to be a good provider for this family he doesn’t have to kill himself to do it working late hours and sacrificing his health. There is so much more peace in our home. You are daddy’s favorite alarm clock. You waking him up in the morning saying okay daddy let’s pray. He loves spending the morning breakfast time with you and Sissy, taking you to gymnastics twice a week, and having you help in the yard.

JoshandDaddyMarch2015

We hope to raise you to have a spirit of an entrepreneur but always put God first and then your spouse and family. With those priorities your life will have great meaning and purpose.  Because of daddy’s obedience to God he was blessed to replace his previous cooperate America income where he worked 60-80 hours. In 3 months our Home Business grew and replaced his income. Now daddy works only 30-40 hours a week and has lots more time to spend with you and us.

Joshua I don’t know what this next year will bring you. My hope and prayers for you are that God will give your Dad and I grace and knowledge in teaching and grooming you.  That you will grow stronger in your understanding and love for Jesus and grow joy in your heart. That you will be kind, helpful, encouraging, and blessing to others. That we all can grow in our discipline for learning and better health.

And most of all Numbers 6 :24-26. Hebrews 13:16 and Exodus 20:12.

We love you Joshua Truman Carter. Happy 5th Birthday!

joshlaugh

The Difference Between Essential oils: Part 1

Grapefruit -Oil

I was reminded recently of how powerful and “Therapeutic Grade” essential oils are. This past month I had some tight muscles that needed some TLC so I made an appointment with my friend who is a massage therapist. She is very talented and a great therapist but for me I feel Raindrop Therapy is so much more effective than a massage for helping overall healing and helping the body, but my body needed some help.

So I brought my Young Living Ortho Ease Massage Oil and she used it on me during the whole massage. Ortho Ease has fractionated Coconut oil, Wintergreen, Grape Seed oil, Juniper, Eucalyptus, Lemongrass, Marjoram, Thyme Eucalyptus, Vetiver, Wheat Germ, Sweet Almond, and Olive oil. So it really is a wonderful combination of oils to help sore, tight and tired muscles.

After the massage I felt amazing. My muscles relaxed, I felt refreshed and so much better. I happily made an appointment for the next month.

So I scheduled for 4 weeks later. At the week 3 point I felt my body tightening up again and also felt like I was coming down with something. So I made an appointment with my friend Tammy Baxter at Hello Beautiful Salon in Crestview Florida for a Raindrop Technique.

The Raindrop Tehcnique uses the Ortho Ease and 9 other wonderful essential oils along the feet and spine. After my session I felt so relaxed, “detoxed of the crude”, and no more tension and tightness. The results lasted all weekend and also helped me to keep cool under some stressful times.

But at week 4 I had a very intense week physically and emotionally and by the time my appointment came around for my massage I was ready for it.

I got on the table and was looking for that wonderful time of relaxation.  My friend is very talented and does a wonderful massage but I realized in the first 10 minutes she wasn’t using the Ortho Ease I had left her.  And every few minutes she would stop and get more oil I thought.

After the session I got off the table and did not feel as relaxed and refreshed as I did just a month ago. I wished I had asked her to use the Ortho Ease oil. I realized at that moment it made a huge difference because even though her hands can massage the tight muscles, the therapeutic Young Living oils can go directly into the cells creating more of an overall change for my body and muscles.

When she came back in she said, “Today I played a little and used Grapefruit and Peppermint on you”. I looked down to see her Aura Cacia oils on her stand. “AGGHHHH! Don’t use those synthetic oils on me!”, is what I wanted to say but I didn’t. I just smiled and said thank you.

But I realized something at that moment. With Young Living’s Peppermint, just one drop on the skin makes a relaxing and refreshing sensation and I didn’t feel any of that. Grapefruit has a beautiful smell, I didn’t smell any of that, yet I know she stopped and used these oils at least 9-10 times. So my body had at least 9-10 drops of these oils on me but I didn’t feel any of them.

My friend uses a few Young Living oils that she really likes but she believes Young Living oils are too expensive so she sells a line of Aura Cacia oils in her office along with a few Young Living oils.

My personal belief is that Young Living oils are not more expensive. They are more effective. She used 9-10 drops of her other brand without any noticeable effect. These are not Therapeutic Grade Essential oils. They may smell nice but they do not have the therapeutic qualities that Young Living oils have.

Why? I will follow up this blog with a report on the 4 different types of essential oils on the market including the Young Living Standard of Therapeutic Grade. And another blog on why I believe Raindrop Technique is one of the most effective body therapies there is.

Thanks for listening. Let me know what you think below.

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

How To Make a Living While Making a Difference

How To Make a Living While Making a Difference

It’s so much more than money… having a home business. As many of you know I started my Young Living home business over 15 years ago and today our business generates per month what some people make in a year. The money is phenomenal but having a home business especially with a company like Young Living that provides such quality products with the highest integrity is so much more than money.

1. It’s a Way to Serve Others
When you own your own home business, the #1 idea you must understand is that your job is to serve others. In Young Living, our job is to share, provide information and support, and eventually leadership. The commission check is just an indicator of how many people we have served.

2. It’s About Friendships  
The Young Living business is about creating lasting and meaningful friendships. I was an only child growing up so making friends wasn’t easy for me. Through my Young Living business I have created thousands of friends and dozens of quality personal relationships that have inspired me, encourage me, and love my family and I. It is so much fun to have friends all over the world.

3. It’s a Way to Learn and Grow
I admit my people skills and professional skills stunk when I first started but with some mentorship I learned how to really listen, communicate, and love on people.

As a side effect of this learning, my marriage became stronger, my parenting more effective and the people who normally annoyed me I learned to handle much more effectively.

I do believe that constant learning and applying what I have learned is the key to my success. What really launched my success was www.firststepstosuccess.com.  I encourage you to attend an event or at least get the First Steps to Wealth book and read it over and over again. If you apply what you learned, your life will never be the same.

4. It’s a Way to Partner with God
In the first 7 years of my business, I was stressed out. I did a ton of meetings running all over Central NY and I helped a lot of people. But I was striving on my own strengths, which would burn out over time.

I eventually started putting on a lot of weight, getting sick, not making time for my health and happiness. Then in November 2007 I let Jesus in to my heart and had a radical wake up call on what life is like Partnering with God.

Matthew 11:30 says, “For my yoke is easy and my burden light”. WOW things started to change for the better when I lived my life based on Biblical principles and God at the center.

I also realized that my little Home Business was my ministry. It was a way I could serve others and minister to others.

5. It’s a Way to Help Others Change Their Lives
Probably the most rewarding job we do with our Young Living home business is helping others change their lives. Initially it may be with an essential oil that helps them with a health challenge or annoying problem.

Helping someone improve their health with a simple, natural, and safe routine like using essential oils everyday or drinking their NingXia Red juice can be life changing in itself, but there is something even greater we can do. We can help them change their financial future.

It’s estimated that 92% of those who enroll for the distributorship in Young Living do so just to receive the wholesale pricing, but 8% are actively working and growing a Young Living business.

Even just achieving the level of Senior Star with an average commission check of $261 can help a family afford their own Young Living products and then some. To achieve that level you are working at about 7 hours a week, your entire team of other distributors and customers do a minimum group volume of sales of $2000 dollars in a month.

If we assume the average monthly order is $150, then that is approximately 14 people ordering in a month. (Note: Young Living has one of the highest client loyalties ever, once people consistently start using our products they will be re-ordering on a monthly basis.)

For those who need or desire to grow bigger businesses, they can do so by increasing the amount of hours they work, skill level and amount of new people they share with on a monthly basis. See this link for 2013 Income Disclosure of Young Living Essential Oils.

Executives work on average 11 hours a week and earn a monthly commission of $617 or $7,404 a year, Silvers work on average 17 hours per week and earn on average $28,020 a year. Now granted these are averages so there are people who are achieving greater amounts and lesser amounts at the same rank.

I know there are people out there right now who need to change their financial future. Maybe you use our products only right now. Maybe you have said you are doing the business but when you really look at it, you aren’t doing anything consistently. Maybe you are in another company but it just doesn’t feel like a good fit for you. Then why don’t we talk?

After 15 years we have the majority of our members just loving our products but 17% of our members are receiving commissions checks for sharing with others, and 159 members have gotten serious about changing their families future and earn income from the Senior Star to Diamond level in our business.

We would love to see that number grow by 25% this year. We have decided we are going to be more vocal about talking to others about the business of Young Living.  It may or may not be a good fit for them but if we don’t show them what we have then they will never have the opportunity to change their lives.

Maybe you are thinking you need to earn more income, supplement your retirement, build a retirement, replace your current job’s income so you can come home, take the financial pressure off of your spouse, or maybe you just want the extra income to be able to travel more, visit your grandkids, or have your own spending money.

If you are interested in seeing how Young Living can help you achieve those goals, my husband Jay and I would love to chat with you. Please email us or call our office so we can set up a time to chat. Really anything is possible with the Young Living home business if you are willing to Serve Others, Partner with God, Build Friendships, Learn and Grow, and don’t give up on your dreams.

Thank you and we look forward to talking with you.

Mary Starr and Jay Carter
Your Total Wellness Coaches

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Tips From Lifeway Marriage Retreat Festival of Marriages

Sandestinocean

A year ago on Valentine’s weekend we attended the LifeWay Marriage Getaway and before we left had signed up to come again this year. As the date got closer I wasn’t really excited about it. It wasn’t that I didn’t want a getaway with my spouse. I just had a spirit of rebellion about attending another training and another class.

I do a lot of training for business and personal development. I get monthly marriage counseling and am very happy and satisfied in my marriage so a part of me wasn’t thrilled about another training.

The weekend started with a free gift LifeWay gave us, The Love Dare book journal.
Love DareThe Love Dare comes from the movie Fireproof, where the main character was challenged to 40 days of loving his wife unconditionally with scripture readings and actions he had to do. This book is recommended for those with marriages falling apart or those who have healthy and strong marriages.

There is also a marriage evaluation that you can take online. It evaluates how you are doing in the following areas of your marriage: Attention, Acceptance, Affirmation, Abiding, Apology, Affection and Allowing. I took the quiz on the first day of the retreat and it made me realize how much more I needed to improve in my part of the marriage.

I think it can be a gentle wake up call for good marriages and a reality check for not so good marriages in areas they need to improve. Definitely take the test yourself. Don’t care so much about your spouse’s score as your own. Marriage success starts on the inside not the outside.

 
marriagegetaways
Here are 6 NUGGETS I picked up from the marriage retreat that I want to share with you:

Marriage should look like God’s love for us
Think about this one… how does God love us? UNCONDITIONALLY… not dependent on if we take the garbage out or gain 50 pounds. He still loves us fully and UNCONDITIONALLY. This is true intimacy.

You are the key to your spouse’s connection with God
By loving your wife or husband like God loves us, you allow and open the door for a more intimate relationship with Christ. And like a TRIANGLE, the closer each spouse becomes in their relationship with Christ the closer they become to each other.

Your spouse is wondering if you are safe to handle their heart?
I don’t think there’s a person in the world who hasn’t experienced deep hurt. Hurt can leave us fragile and vulnerable and even cause us to put up walls in our most intimate relationships or even avoid relationships to protect ourselves.

If we are to give ourselves fully to our spouse, we give them our heart and the other spouse’s job to protect it must be at their highest priority.

One of the greatest joys we have in our marriage is the opportunity to help heal wounds we never caused.  

You wouldn’t talk to your Momma that way… why is it we can give respect and honor to our grandparents or parents but our spouse we can speak to ugly, disrespectful, or even hurtful?

If we really took our job to PROTECT the love and heart of our spouse then we would choose our words carefully, honor and respect our spouse in words, actions and behaviors. Sadly many women and men have not been taught how to do this so that is where counseling, coaching, personal development and communication skills training would be very valuable.

I always refer friends, family and co-workers to training my husband and I did over a dozen times www.firststepstosuccess.com. We went to improve our businesses but found the skills we learned radically changed our marriage too.

When you become a better person and understand and have compassion for your spouse’s past hurts and possible hangups, you can open up a door for healing for them and Godly deliverance.

Intimacy comes from Connection versus Affection.  

Our culture is defining what intimacy is through TV, music, and reality TV. It defines it as mostly sex and many times not in the confines of marriage.

Intimacy involves our Emotional Connection, our Mental Connection, our Spiritual Connection and our Physical Connection.  

Mark 12:30 is our Biblical Reference to Intimacy with God and God says for us to love each other in the same way.

The physical relationship and sex in marriage is just not addressed in church or the body of believers. Most people don’t even know what the Bible says about sex. We may hear don’t have it until you’re married but nothing else.

The Bible tells us sex is for the following four purposes within marriage:

1. Procreation – to have children
2. Consummation – to seal our union
3. Recreation – for our enjoyment within our marriage
4. Protection – to protect our marriage

On a side note we learned about teaching our sons and daughters the value of their virginity. A virgin daughter was as valuable as 5-7 years of wages just 2000 years ago.  Sons were taught to value and protect the virginity of a girl. Interesting… I think we would see some serious cultural shift if we started grooming our children this way, huh?

Listening can be a key to intimacy with your spouse.   

Really LISTEN to your Spouse: Ask questions like tell me more about that? What can I do to help you? Again I will have to refer everyone to the www.firststepstosuccess.com trainings and danijohnson.com programs like GEMS. These trainings helped me and continue to help me improve my listening and communication skills.

All in all I was very blessed by the marriage retreat this year. It was a wonderful wake up call to the things I need to improve in my marriage, educated me on some things I didn’t know, and lastly was a sweet and memorable time away with my spouse.

Here is a picture of us taking a nap overlooking the beach during one of our breaks. Hey when you have little kids, an uninterrupted nap is a DREAM COME TRUE!

Takinganap
We pray for your marriages and that you will take some of the information and apply it in your marriage. Let us know if it helps!

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

How to Make Your Marriage Go the Distance Call

Marriage-Seminar-Facebook-Post

How to Make Your Marriage Go the Distance Call

By: Mary Clendin

Marriage is a wonderful thing! It can bring so much joy, but it is not always easy. It takes work… individually and as a team.

When we first get married, we have dreams of what life with our love will be. We have plans, dreams and believe that our marriage will be different…we won’t be like other unhappy couples we know and certainly never argue.

Then life happens. You have that first argument. You are living with your love day in and day out. The things that you once adored are now driving you crazy. You also learn that true love takes on a different meaning.

We first see true love through immature eyes and it grows and it grows and matures into something different. True love isn’t all about the romance, flowers and dreams. True love can be doing something for your spouse that you don’t enjoy doing. It can be getting up with the kids at night so your exhausted spouse can sleep, even when you are exhausted yourself. Taking care of each other during sickness.  Putting each other first, loving and supporting each other, doing little things your spouse loves. It is the little things you do daily to show love and commitment, not just the special gifts and romance on Valentine’s Day.

I am delighted to be able to share with you words of wisdom from two people who are helping to change lives, Dr. Jack & Dr. Lavonne Atnip of The Encouragement Center.

They have been counseling others in all walks of life and all types of struggles for over 30 years.  Dr. Lavonne has become a treasured friend and mentor in my own life.

I would like to invite you on Tuesday, February 10th at 8pm EST to join us for a call on How to Make Your Marriage Go the Distance: 5 Tips for Staying Married 55 Years. 

They have been married for 55 years and have much wisdom to share on this subject.  You will learn how to cultivate a successful marriage and how to help it to go the distance. There will be struggles and roadblocks all along the way, but you can learn to navigate them and experience true joy in you home.

Join us for the incredible price of just $27. Just think… $27 is so little to invest in your marriage. How might this call change your lives? Not only your lives but generations to come.

Sessions are normally almost $200, but I am delighted to bring you, my readers,  a special for Valentine’s Day.

Please visit Mary’s website to reserve your spot.

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Total Wellness Private Association

This Friday I will be in Tampa Florida to present my first Total Wellness Private Association meeting. I am excited and nervous at the same time.

For more than 15 years I have had the freedom to share and speak about health challenges and solutions I have seen in practice. I have a Doctorate Degree in Chiropractic yet even before I was a Chiropractor and after my focus and passion have been on educating the public about safe natural health solutions including Young Living Essential Oils.

But I am no longer able to speak freely as it will be construed as making claims, diagnosing and prescribing and could put Young Living Essential Oils and myself at risk with the Food and Drug Administration.

Would you ever think there would come a day when you couldn’t share with others about natural safe healthy solutions that have been used for centuries to treat disease? YIKES! It is here…

So thus we have moved to a Private Association. The main objective of our Private Association will be to maintain, protect and improve all of the civil and personal rights guaranteed to all citizens and their families under the United States Constitution and specifically under the Bill of Rights Amendments thereto; and to teach and empower Association members to understand and use these rights for the benefit of themselves, their families, friends, clients and members of the public when asked to do so.

The mission of the Total Wellness Association shall be to coach, discuss, educate, explain, facilitate, instruct, mentor, supervise, teach, train and tutor each other; to demonstrate skills and techniques, examine, quiz and test each other to measure learning; and to empower each other and the public to make all of their own decisions concerning their own health, life, nutrition, spirituality, therapies and wellness; and that of their family, dependents and pets.

On February 7th, the Total Wellness Association will host two educational sessions. The first on the Basics of Essential Oils and the second on Essential Oil Techniques. We will also have a non-Association Young Living Home Business Training which will be open to everyone later in the afternoon.

For more information visit http://www.thetotalwellnessdoc.com/florida-classes/.

We will offer Guests Membership Applications for those attending that day. Only those that are guest members can attend. We will have the paperwork for admission to the meeting at the event. Please understand that as members or guest members of this Association you are not allowed to share this information outside your own family household… it does stink, but in the future we will be opening up certain events and tele-events where you can invite your friends and clients to be guest members as well.

So all in all change is painful but if we aren’t growing we are rotting, right? We have made the decision that is best for us, our clients, and our business.

Forming a Private Association is not something every Young Living member or Distributor of Natural Health Products should do. We are making large investments of time and energy to create something that will help many of our Associates, team members, and future clients. We are following the rules so that we can continue to help others.

I look forward to seeing you in Florida or at a future event. We will be in North Carolina and Gaffney South Carolina March 12th – March 15th. Keep checking our Events Page at http://www.thetotalwellnessdoc.com/dr-mary-starr-events/.

I appreciate your patience and understanding in this time of change.

Sincerely,

Mary Starr Carter

The Total Wellness Doc and Mom

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

How To Program New Habits

How to Program New Habits

With the New Year just upon us, resolutions are probably still in full swing. Many of us want to get out of debt, lose weight and or get in shape, and maybe change our overall life circumstances.

All those things take changing habits and behavior. To change our habits and behavior we need to re-program our brains and bodies. To re-program our brains and bodies we need to feed them usually differently than we have in the past.

HOW DO YOU FEED YOUR BRAIN?  

Change What You Listen To:
One powerful way to help re-program your brain is be carefully choosing what you listen to. There is nothing wrong with listening to Elvis Classics on Sirus Radio on your 45 minute commute to work everyday. But what if you took half that time and listened to Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace CDs to help you learn how to get out of debt?

I love NPR as much as the next person but what if three times a week you listened to some Health and Wellness Training CDs to help educate you about your health challenges.

But Dr. Mary I love to get in the groove in the morning with the top 40 hits… well that’s fine, but what if you picked just a few favorites to get you going in the morning, or even transitioned to listening to music that had great rhythm but was sending your brain a positive, uplifting and spiritual based message. My favorite is listening to KLOVE… try it for 30 days and just watch how the mood of you and your family changes.

Here are some of my tips:

1. Be Intentional
What areas of your life do you want to work on?

Spiritual Wellness: Maybe you want to start reading your Bible more but can’t fit it into your days. You now have the option to listen via a smartphone app I have the Daily Bible App that has a Daily Plan helping you listen and read the Bible in a year.

Define what it is you are resolving to change and then choose books, audios, and radio shows, or TV shows that can help you TRAIN YOUR BRAIN.

2. Stay Motivated
How will you stay motivated?

Probably the hardest part of our willingness to change is motivation.

Physical health is an area that we can easily fall off the wagon or lose our motivation. One of the tips I use is to watch things that will re-motivate me. I love health documentaries on Netflix, or audio books on gluten intolerance, or a motivational book or blog by other people who have released weight or changed their health.

Maybe your goal is to get more sleep this year. I highly recommend watching the Nova Special Sleepless in America. It was very powerful for both my husband and myself. We made a commitment to change our sleep patterns after that and it has been two weeks and we both have felt so much better physically and emotionally.

Daily, weekly or monthly choose reading, listening or watching material that will help you stay motivated.

3. Repetition
They say the mother of all learning is repetition. When we repeat something, we pick up new ideas, get re-motivated, or even understand things at a deeper level.  Listen, watch or read the same thing over and over so it really penetrates your brain. It all starts with your brain and thoughts. Change your thinking and you can change your habits.

4. Use Technology and Save  
I bet I could find another $200 to $500 in your yearly budget. $500 could help you pay off debt, get a yearly gym membership, buy you a monthly cleaning lady visit, a nice weekend away, or even a weekly babysitter.

What if you transitioned your cable and or Sirius Radio to Netflix, Hulu, or Audible?  There are many primetime TV shows that if you are willing to wait a day or week, you can watch for FREE on the Internet. Because most TV’s are becoming Internet capable. This is a huge savings.

But if you are like me and have kids, you need cartoons, learning shows etc. to stay sane. Netflix for about $8 a month will do the trick. Need your movies? Well upgrade Netflix to about $16 a month and you can get newer movies in the mail.

Your smartphone has multiple apps on it for FREE to help you listen to programs, sermons, and just about anything you want. My three favorites are my Bible app, Elevation podcast, and Dave Ramsey’s EntreLeadership podcasts. Audible is a membership site with minimal monthly fees that lets you own books to listen to at a fraction of the cost of the book.

5. Combine Your Activities
Most moms I work with have very limited time. “I don’t have time to read.” “I don’t have time to exercise.”…  Well there are always solutions to every problem. If you are making it a priority, then you need to find ways to get the activities in to make the change.

WALK and LISTEN

EXERCISE and WATCH

DRIVE and STUDY

With the technology solutions I just gave you, you can now combine all these activities. Your phone can be playing a book on tape while you have a morning walk, your laptop can be playing your favorite inspirational TV show while you are working out, and your car can become your new learning university on wheels.

Audible and my smartphone are my favorites because I am in a season of life without a lot of time for quiet sit down reading but I can listen at least an hour broken up throughout my day from walking, shower, dish doing or driving. My Audible membership is the best $14 a month I spend a month on me.

The last tip or warning I will give you is:

BE CAREFUL 
You have to be very cautious of who and what you listen to.

Something may sound positive, uplifting, and even ring true but it may be specifically leading you down a road of fruitlessness.  Years ago I used to listen to this CD trainings that on the outside seemed very powerful spiritually and life changing.

These individuals had and have thousands of people following them, ordering their monthly trainings and trying to utilize what they learned. One day my eyes were really opened to how empty these teachings were. I recognized it from the results that the people got who took these trainings. YIKES! That was a WAKE UP CALL…

There are even SECRET SOCIETIES out there that have these books they have written that say they have all the SECRETS to WEALTH, HAPPINESS, SUCCESS. BE CAREFUL anytime you have to qualify to be able to read a book or have to pay money repeatedly to be a part of something.

Here is a list of great reads, watches, or listening I did in the past month…

Train your brain daily with positive focused learning and watch how it helps mold your behaviors

Audible

Unstoppable by Christine Caine

What the Most Successful People Do Before Breakfast by Laura Vanderkam

The Best Yes by Lysa Terkeurst

From Paupers to Princes by Kris Vallotton

Smartphone Apps

Daily Bible

Elevation App – The Power of Same by Steven Furtick

KV Ministries – Healthy Families by Kris Vallotton

Netflix

Fat Sick and Nearly Dead 2

Tiny House

Forks over Knives

Property Brothers

Grace Unplugged movie

Silver Linings Playbook movie

Signing Time (learning sign language with my kids)

Internet TV

PBS Nova Special Sleepless in America

PBS Call of the Midwife Christmas Special

Tiny Houses

Tree House Masters

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Turning 40

I turned 40 years old this past Tuesday the 6th of January. Thank you for all the birthday wishes on Facebook. I spent 40 hours on a retreat by myself, no kids, no husband just me doing what I wanted. Sound selfish or does it sound awesome to you? Do you feel like you could never ask for what you want or do what you want? A few days before my birthday I posted this on Facebook:

I am turning 40 in a few days and it took the past 4 weeks and 40 years of my life to learn how to start asking for what I need and more importantly what I want. Do you ask for you want? Or do you shy away because you put others needs in front of yours, or you think you don’t really need it, or you are afraid of rejection or disappointment. #‎almost40

The response I got was overwhelming.  Many women and men are not asking for what they need.

I spend every day putting others first, even total strangers. It has taken a major toll on my health over the past few years and though I will continue to serve and bless others its time to take care of me and that starts with asking for what I want and need!  – Health and WellnessCoach & Mom of 5 children from 17- 5 months old

So why do we put everyone else first but ourselves? Here were some of your answers:

I’m a people pleaser. I hate confrontation. I don’t like to disappoint people and I fear rejection.

It’s hard for me to ask for what I need, I put others needs before my own. I am afraid of disappointment, which is why I rarely ask.

Put others needs in front of mine mostly and fear of rejection and disappointment.

And I’ve always feared coming across as selfish when I want too much for myself.

I tend to give give give and burn out. Learning more how to ask so I do not.

Probably 60/40. I still hesitate not so much out of fear but concern that I am being too selfish. Then I get a grip and realize who better than will really know what I need.

Some of you are more comfortable serving others than receiving help. Here is a comment from a woman who loves to serve but is understanding that it’s also good to receive too.

I am by far way more comfortable serving others needs than being served. One day after leaving someone’s home that I had the privilege of caring for, I was overwhelmed by the joy of being able to be a blessing to this person. It was then that God showed me that by being “self sufficient” instead of accepting help when I am in need, I was robbing the other person of their blessing in serving my needs.

It appears that with age comes wisdom. Some of the women who are older than me gave me these comments:

I ask now, if I need help with anything. Too many years, I did it all, and making me last (it was exhausting!), no more!! It’s my time now!. And I’m not afraid to say No, if I don’t want something, or don’t want to do something. I can say NO without feeling guilty!! But it took me till 60 not or 40 to figure it out!! Glad you did 20 years before me!

I flat out ask. I used to hint around without success.

Yes, it takes us some time to figure this out, but once you do…look out! Your life will take on a whole new meaning!!

There is something about 40 that changes your brain and the things you have dealt with all your life look different.

So there it is 40 and now finally understanding that I need to ask for what I want. But first we must understand what it is we want, be able to communicate it effectively, and lastly be okay if a person or group of individuals can not give us what it is we need or want.

This topic leads us to an important topic for 2015 I like to call SELF CARE. Self Care is more than getting some daily exercise, enough sleep, getting our hair done or a massage. We will discover more about Self Care this year for yours and my benefit. They say each year you should think of a word or phrase that will lead you throughout it. For me it’s SELF CARE… so that is what you will see monthly in our blogs.

Our first assignment is figuring out what it is we need and want and learning how to effectively ask for it.

Last year I coached a mom to be sure to communicate effectively to her husband before a big anniversary date in which he normally gave her expensive jewelry that what she really wanted and what would bring her much more joy and peace was a weekly cleaning lady. She did it and guess what? Every Friday she comes home to clean toilets, mop floors, vacuum rugs, and clean sheets on their beds. Recognizing what she needed, asking effectively and the husband responding to her wishes makes this mom so much happier and makes him a SUPERSTAR in her eyes every week.

Your turn. Figure out this week something you need and who it is that can assist you with that. Communicate with them directly what it is you need. Be okay with whatever the answer is. Let us know how it goes over on our Facebook Page.

For your Total Wellness,

Mary Starr Carter
the Total Wellness Doc and Mom

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Peace and Freedom in the Midst of Crisis

When we lost our baby we had no insurance. YIKES. I know my mom is going to freak out. It was just a choice we made at that time due to risk ratio and what the insurance would cover with my midwife. I do believe in insurance. I recommend people have it.

But did you know that hospitals, laboratories, and doctors give discounts for immediate payments? That’s right. Because we paid at time of service for our diagnostic testing, doctor’s fees, and hospital visits we saved almost $10,000 compared to what the insurance bill would have been.

If I had insurance to cover the visits and only had to pay the insurance fee, co-pays and deductibles I still would have saved almost $3000 because I could pay immediately.

What’s my point?

We are unique because we had the money to cover our medical expenses. What about you? What would a bill for $7000 do to your family’s household budget, savings, or debt load?

We are unique because we have freedom. We have freedom to grieve, heal and rest more than a month without losing income, using up vacation days, having to cut our lifestyle.

What would happen to your savings, your family’s lifestyle, your vacation days if you had to take 3 weeks of time off? What about 3 months?

Don’t get me wrong. My family still has debt we are working on, we don’t live in a beautiful mansion, and we actually only have one car we lease. I am not at a place I would call perfection but I am at a place I can call PEACEFUL.

A place where my husband could leave a very stressful job that was killing him. A place where we can hire a home helper to assist us with the kids, errands, cleaning, cooking etc. A place where we can pack up and move near our family living where we want to live and not where a job tells us we have to be.

I am here to tell you that you can have that PEACE & FREEDOM too. My heart hurts for the people who don’t have the resources and support and go through what Jay and I have gone through four times losing our babies. Each time it gets worse on our hearts but each time we are at a better and better place to deal with the loss. That is from creating more and more FREEDOM in our lives.

The freedom we have in our life wasn’t FREE. In fact for the first 10 years we learned, grew, failed, and worked to so hard we burned out many times. Then we got smarter utilized what we learned and have worked the past 5 years without so much burn out. We still must work, but we have and continue to learn how to work SMART.

Tell me where do you want to be the next time tragedy hits your family. In a place where you are just getting by or do you want to be FREE…

If your answer is YES and if you are serious about learning more about our journey and if it is the right thing for you, call our office at 1888-351-6850 or email us at info@starrhealth.com.

I don’t know if what our family did to create FREEDOM in our lives is right for you. What I do know is we have helped hundreds of people live a better lives and if we can help you we will.

That is our commitment. Helping Families live Better Lives. God Bless you.

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

 

5 Ways Grieving Affects the Whole Family

5 Ways Grieving Affects the Whole Family

When a family has a loss of a baby, the whole family grieves. You would think it would be just the mom and maybe the dad, but really it’s the whole family. Maybe your family has been through difficult times. Divorce, death of a loved one, a move away from loved ones, loss of a job and downgrade of your lifestyle. I guess all these things could cause grief for family members.

Here are my observations and my opinions of what may transpire due to the loss:

1. Illness – I watched my good friend and neighbor Debbie lose several loved ones in a row followed by our move to Florida. She had a constant cold and illness for more than 9 months.

Immune System: Grief weakens the immune system. Stress associated with months of turmoil before or after a loss causes our cortisol “stress hormone” to pump out. The adrenal glands that pump out the stress hormone called cortisol can literally burn out… which can leave us with an even bigger problem of chronic fatigue.

Recognize that your family members may start to get sick weeks or months after the loss. If you see repetitive illness, you may want to focus on building the immune system of the entire family.

2. Lack of Energy –  “I walk around the block and I need to come in and take a nap.” “I barely can get through the day without falling asleep.” “I need stimulants like coffee, soda, or energy drinks to do my job.”

Do these things sound familiar?

Some people need these things regardless. But after a loss we can become more and more dependent on “energy aides”. The burning out of the adrenal glands is many times a culprit. And this is much more common in our population than you think. This can also result in one good day of energy and doing things followed by a bad day.

For me I found myself having a good day of energy where I cared for the kids, decorated for Christmas, and took a short walk. The following day I found myself so exhausted I literally had to sleep for 4 hours in the middle of the day.

Adrenal exhaustion will put you on a roller coaster until you get on track for healing it. To learn more about Adrenal Exhaustion and if you have it, visit this page.

3. Fogginess – After the loss, your body and brain may be in a state of shock for weeks or months afterwards. You may forget names, appointments, where you left things and the common “what was I looking for” when you enter a room. Concentration is difficult. I have ruined several meals trying to cook, wasted expensive supplements by accidentally flushing them down the drain, put my clothing on wrong and the list goes on.

How about you? Have you just chalked your “mistakes” up to age, carelessness, or disorganization? What really may be going on is your body’s healing and grieving process.

4. Appetite – This can seem to go either way for loss. In many cases initially there is a loss of appetite. Weight loss is common when grieving but so is weight gain. We comfort ourselves with foods we love or crave. Our eating patterns can become irregular going all day without food and then bingeing on a dozen cookies or a cake at night. The problem with poor eating patterns is this can contribute to adrenal fatigue even more. YIKES… and that can lead to a poorer immune system.

So eating healthy at least eventually after a loss will be important for your healing. But I will admit as soon as we left the hospital I made my husband get me a large peppermint ice cream chocolate dipped cone. Sometimes you need the comfort. But if you do it daily, you will wreck your health and put on the pounds, no matter if that’s all you eat all day.

5. Behavior – Each person may react differently based on the kind of trauma or loss they had. For women who lose babies, we deal with a huge hormone shift which many times can result in Post Partum Depression. This can result in anxiety, moodiness, depression and the list goes on. For me I recognize it through lack of patience with my children, husband or employees. The roller coaster of despair, crying, anxiety, and even happiness.

When you have illness involved with your grief, you will have even more lack of patience. When I heard about a sick single mom swearing at her kids after a great loss, I had more pity on her then disgust. It’s really hard to get through the day without yelling when you have small children and your body is hurting and your heart is hurting. I can’t imagine doing it without support.

Our family members… acute or chronic illness can affect our family members in a variety of ways. Young children may exhibit behavior to get attention, or outbursts, nightmares, bed wetting, withdrawals, anxieties, fears and so on. Teenage children may show similar characteristics but they may also seek attention in others outside the family who may not be the best influence. Alcohol and drugs, sexual attention, bad influences, and even cutting are behaviors that may be seeded from trauma.

Sadly a year ago we lost a baby early on in my pregnancy. I thought I was really the only one affected but looking back I can see it with new eyes. A year ago my husband a strong man who allows me to grieve first it seems, then when I am better you see it affect him. We lost our baby in February and by April he had gained 15 more pounds, had been struggling with repetitive colds, and lack of patience. My son was acting out, refused to work with his new therapist, and pooped his pants almost daily.

This year I see my husband still trying to be strong but his immune system has crashed and he has been sick for weeks. My son has broken out in terrible eczema and sores on his face, he has been bed wetting, and today I got a report that he is not obeying and even hitting in his gym class. At first I was really upset and worried but then I looked beyond it and realized what was really going on with him. I wrote to the gym and coaches and let them know what was going on with our family, asked for some grace and came up with a few solutions to help with his behavior next time.

A new awareness gives me some hope during this difficult time and I hope it does to you too. I hope this article can give you some ideas and things to look for when dealing with loss. As I go through more of the healing process myself, I will share things that helped our family and our health.

God Bless you and your family,

Mary Starr Carter
The Total Wellness Doc and Mom

 

Disclaimer: This information is not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. It’s strictly for informational, educational, or entertainment purposes ONLY. The products I talk about are not meant to diagnose, prescribe, treat or cure any illness or disease. Any information I give you about them is for informational or entertainment purposes only. They have not been evaluated or approved by the FDA. Please seek the qualified health professional of your choice when making health decisions for yourself, your family and your pets.

Losing Gabe and Matters of the Heart

I know many of you have been praying for my family and I since I put out the prayer request early last Wednesday morning on Facebook. We are grateful for your prayers. They gave us and continue to give us a huge peace through all this.

For those of you who haven’t heard, we lost our un-born baby Gabrielle Daniel Carter. After a routine ultrasound where we hoped to find out the baby’s sex we were informed that the baby was only 16 1/2 weeks in growth not 20 weeks. Later that day our midwife called to inform us the baby had no heartbeat. After another ultrasound and a consultation with an OB we were admitted to Sacred Heart Hospital on the Emerald Coast.

I was induced on Tuesday December 2nd at 7pm. I peacefully passed the baby a little after 3am by myself, then the doctor came and helped to deliver the placenta. The doctor and nurses were quite surprised that I delivered so quickly and without the use of additional doses of inducement drugs, pain killers, or an epidural. They don’t understand the power of prayers and God’s medicine – essential oils… we do and we used them.

We were able to hold our son. We named him Gabriel Daniel a name that God gave me with several signs in the last couple of weeks. Several weeks ago my mother called and told me she had a dream that her grandmother Mary, (my name sake who passed several weeks before I was born) was holding a baby boy. At the time we thought it was a sign she was holding him until he was born but now looking back we believe it was when he passed. By his size and measurements Gabe had passed several weeks ago. From his appearance Gabe was not developing normally and this was most likely determined at conception. We believe God took Gabe early to spare him and us further pain.

I got to anoint Gabe with Frankincense and speak “heaven talk” over him before we had to leave him. It was the most beautiful and special thing. We know without a doubt where our son is. We know without a doubt that your prayers have and continue to have a wall of protection over us.

They allowed us to leave the hospital Wednesday but I was on bed rest. We choose to stay on the Emerald Coast and got a beautiful room on the ocean. Although I couldn’t put my feet in the sand, it was still beautiful to look outside and see it.

BeachWater

We have lost 3 other babies back to Heaven before they were born. The process is difficult. With Gabe it has been most difficult in many ways. If you have had early miscarriages you know the first Trimester is full of worry. Once you make it past the first 12 weeks you feel lighter, happier, worry less and start making plans for your new loved one.

Each person’s process of loss is different. For me I feel numb for a while, then grief comes later. But I am blessed to have an awareness of why God took our baby. My faith does not waiver because Jesus is my Savior and some day I will be in heaven with all my babies.

A week after our loss, my heart and body started to grieve. And then my Immune System started to shut down. I came to a realization that I can not just go back to my regular life with just a little bit of rest everyday. I need time to heal. My husband is a strong man and grieves differently from me as well. Unfortunately he had been sick for almost 3 weeks with a cold that turned into pneumonia before we got our bad news. Afterwards his coughing caused his back to go out which left him in terrible physical pain too. I realized I needed to call in Reinforcements Spiritually and Physically. I am blessed to have a network of support around me who I can ask for help.

I ask for your continued support and prayers as our family heals. During the rest of the month of December and maybe into January we will be taking time off for healing physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Our assistant will be putting up some posts as me in groups and on my page. Please note she will read any message you send in chat, email or direct message, answer those she can and share with me what is necessary. Her direct email is lori@starrhealth.com if you have anything that needs attention.

 

Thank you again for your support, understanding and prayers,

Dr. Mary Starr Carter and Jay Carter

Some Days Are Harder Than Others

Some days are just harder than others.  We all have had those difficult days, weeks, months or even years. But many of us have a spouse or loved one who helps carry us through those tough times. Recently I had a tough day and my husband was sick so he couldn’t give me moral support or help. That night as I was struggling to get my kids ready for bed I thought how hard it must be to parent alone.

According to the US Census Bureau in 2013 of 17 million single parent families, 80% are single moms. 1 and 4 kids under 18 won’t grow up with their biological dad.  Single moms struggle financially with more than 50% living in poverty and many close to it. Not only are there financial burdens of raising kids, but I don’t think we can even imagine the stress of a raising kids on our own. Every diaper is yours, every bath time, teeth brushing, laundry doing, grocery shopping, homework checking, and so on. And not to mention cooking and cleaning.

Where I live there are many moms who aren’t single but have husbands that are deployed out of the country. They become single moms again. And then there are moms whose husbands work out of town for most of the week, or do contract work out of state.

Why do I bring all of this up? Before the holidays hit I just want us to think about someone we know or know of that does parenting mostly by themselves. Could they use some help? You may not have the financial means to help them, but could you help in other ways? If they are self employed could you refer some business to them, could you offer to clean their house, do they need someone to do some shopping for them?

This time of year also comes with a lot of charitable donations. It can be sometimes annoying with the constant clanging bells, but remember Christmas is just the beginning of a season that can be very dark and difficult for single parents. Higher utility bills, cost of holidays, babysitters etc. can really overwhelm a single parent.  Giving to a charity that helps the poor will probably help a single parent too.  Taking $25 out of your Christmas budget or maybe even $250 to let someone else enjoy the holiday may be the true sense of Christmas.

In the Bible, God commands us to take care of the orphans and widows, in today’s day and age I believe the same command can go for single parents.  Reach out and give a single parent a hand.

God will give you a thumbs up for it and you may never know how much that parent may need your help.

God Bless,

Mary Starr Carter
the Total Wellness Doc and Mom